One Obnoxious Dude, and the Mrs. goes ballistic

[Alan H]

So this past weekend was my lady's birthday. We went hiking on Saturday and then on Sunday we went up to Mill Valley (Marin County, California...very nice neighborhood) to see a play that starred the woman who's her favorite dance teacher at her aerobics club. After the show (it was very good) we went out with the whole passel of girls from the club that came (and their husbands) to dinner at a nice restaurant in Tiburon. Now, if you live in California, you might recognize Tiburon as one darned eyeball-glazing-over expensive neighborhood.

NICE digs, is Tiburon.

ANY-way, so we're walking the scenic route from the parking lot through a quiet side street in the shopping district, over to the restaurant. I get the usual glances from the guys and a couple of little smiles from the ladies and a full-on eye-meets-eye look from another woman....pretty bold what with my wife right there, but that's what happens when you're kilted, yaknow? Anyway, so this guy with a really rude t-shirt on spots me from about 30 feet away as we're walking on converging paths.

In the most obnoxious...not aggressive, mind you, but just plain obnoxious an dloud manner possible, he comes up with the "what are you wearing under the kilt?" question.

Now, usually I'm cool with it. I don't lose my temper, and I figure most times this question is just harmless fun as long as they keep their hands (and cameras) to themselves. But this guy was...well, OBNOXIOUS. So I came back with my most aggressive reply, which of course I learned on this board.

"Why do you want to know?" says I with a cheerful smile.

To my surprise, he comes back with, at about 9.5 on the volume scale... "Well, if I was a homosexual, I might want to get quicker access. HAR HAR HAR HAR."

I could see my wife's blood pressure rising.

I just said... " Well, if I told you what I was wearing, then that would take away all the mystery, wouldn't it? And that's no fun, now is it? So I'll just have to leave you in suspense and give you something to dream about tonight. See, the only person who gets to know what under my kilt is her"...pointing at my lady, and chuckled again...

He comes back with, still in good humour mind you....he never got aggressive, just seriously obnoxious, and pushing the volume scale up to about 12.5 so that people for 50 feet in either direction are turning and looking... "Yeah, that's no good. If I saw your p**ker, it wouldn't be pornography any more. You know, porn is all about...." ***edited 'cause this is a "family-friendly" forum***

Yeah, you read this right....that's exactly what he said, on the street, in the middle of Tiburon, on Sunday afternoon at about 5:45, at the top of his bleedin' lungs..... but he never got to finish his sentence.

He really blew it, 'cause my lady went ballistic. I mean, in your face....she's all of 5' 4" about 120 pounds and this guy was easily 6'2" and 180-190, and she just ripped him a new....yes, well. you know what she did. It was quite loud, and it was quite forceful and he was VERY surprised.

I was rather surprised myself, actually.

This is my wife who gets annoyed at me wearing kilts. This is the wife who gets huffy at the expense of kilts, and that I had to go face-to-face with to stand my ground and inform her that she has no right to tell me what to do or what to wear and **I WILL** be wearing a kilt when **I WANT TO** and she can just deal with it. This is the second time she's laid into someone who's disparaged my kilt-wearing in one form or another. Her fuse is a whole, whole lot shorter than mine is, I must say. It's pretty funny. I'd just write the guy off as an obnoxious lout, but SHE has to give him an earful.

Just goes to show....she can be annoyed at her guy, but let anyone ELSE do it, and LOOK OUT.... LOLOL

So for you guys who worry about what your spouse will say, there ya go.

[jfellrath]

Yeah yeah, go Mrs. H!

It's nice when the wives are so supportive. My wife and I were at a Columbus Crew game and I was wearing my Khaki UK as usual, and the lady next to us (on the other side of my wife) had apparently never seen one or something. She kept staring at me with one of these incredulous looks. At one point she tapped her husband on the shoulder and pointed to my kilt. His response was apparently something like "Hm. Cool," and he went back to watching the game. Keep in mind that I'm noticing none of this - when I'm at a game, I watch the GAME. Very little else gets my attention.

Finally, after a first half full of this activity, my wife looks over at the lady and says "You know, if you want a picture, I'll take one. It'll last longer." Apparently this got one of those sort of yuppie faux-aghast looks as if "Well, I never" but she stopped staring so blatantly.

My wife cracks me up.

[bubba]

Apparently this got one of those sort of yuppie faux-aghast looks as if "Well, I never" but she stopped staring so blatantly.

My wife cracks me up.

Mt favorite response to that line is "Oh I'm sure you have"

[Bob C]

Mt favorite response to that line is "Oh I'm sure you have"

I prefer, "And, you probably never will!"

Good show by your wife, Alan. That's great.

[Graham]

Way to go Alan, tell your wife we are all proud of her!!

Personally, I wouldn't have wasted one word on the guy. However, I get times too when I get really fed up with ignorance.

[Rob Wright]

Alan, you are a lucky man to have a wife such as yours

Rob

[Rigged]

Wow. I've lived in Tiburon (and other parts around Mill Valley). Like any town it has its share of town drunks, obnoxious fools and clueless jerks.

Sounds like you got all of them in one person.

[GMan]

Alan,

Your wife sounds like a peach! Putting that loud obnoxious person in his place, well done for the both of you.

[Andrew Breecher]

Give your wife a high-five for me!

I came across a drunk obnoxious guy once, with his girlfriend, while I was out with a friend. The guy kept saying, "Is that a skirt? Why are you wearing a skirt?" I told him once, "It's a kilt," and then proceeded to ignore him. When he continued to make a big deal and call it a skirt, his girlfriend told him to shut up. My friend finally turned around and told him, "It's a kilt, and it's awesome." I love it when girls get my back.

Andrew.