A gift for a Celtic funeral

[Clockwork John]

A friend of mine from church, who happens to also be a Campbell, recently lost his wife. The funeral is this evening. I'm going kilted, because he's a clansman and we frequently discuss our mutual heritage. So, anyway... my question is this: what is a good "traditional" gift to take someone who is mourning? Should I pick up a bottle of single malt, or is there something more appropriate?

[ccga3359]

A friend of mine from church, who happens to also be a Campbell, recently lost his wife. The funeral is this evening. I'm going kilted, because he's a clansman and we frequently discuss our mutual heritage. So, anyway... my question is this: what is a good "traditional" gift to take someone who is mourning? Should I pick up a bottle of single malt, or is there something more appropriate?

I'm not aware that one gifts those in mourning. The closest I've heard of is a wake to celebrate the life of those we've lost. Offer your support, a shoulder, an ear. Be a friend in a time of need.

[Barclay]

A gift is a nice idea, and a bottle of a good single malt is fine, provided that he is a drinker. However, speaking as a funerian, it's not really appropriate to take a gift to the funeral. It would be better to wait a couple of days and deliver it to his home. Friendship, though, is the best gift you can offer.

[Clockwork John]

Unfortunately, he lives a couple of hours away, and this may be the only chance I have. And I probably should have specified, it's an Orthodox funeral, and as I am a choir member/chanter, I'm technically a part of the funeral service... I think I'll go ahead and pick up a bottle, and then try to find an approprite moment either before or after the service to give him the gift(and maybe share it).

[Moosedog]

I'm sure your friend will appreciate whatever gift you bring.

Moosedog

[Coemgen]

Memory eternal.

[Clockwork John]

Well, it was a lovely service. I did end up taking him a bottle of Scotch, and he really appreciated the gesture. His late wife was definitely "a living miracle" as our priest put it...a female Job... she survived poverty, cancer, and brain surgery... and even when she was told her cancer was terminal, her faith never wavered.

May her memory be eternal.

[davedove]

I have never heard of taking a gift to a funeral. However, funerals are times when family and friends get together afterwards. It is very appropriate to take a food item to these events. This is a way to ease the burden on the closest family members, who should not have to be concerned with providing for the guests.

[Chef]

I have never heard of taking a gift to a funeral. However, funerals are times when family and friends get together afterwards. It is very appropriate to take a food item to these events. This is a way to ease the burden on the closest family members, who should not have to be concerned with providing for the guests.

Well gift isn't quite the right term, but it is quite common to bring food to those left behind in many cultures including the Scots. Not for the wake, but taken to the home so the widow wouldn't need to entertain those family members and friends gathered around. I remember this happening quite often growing up. It was also common for someone to bring a bottle of whisky. This way there was no expense on the widow, also in many families while they might drink, they didn't keep enough in the house for more than a couple of guests if they had it at all.

So all in all the bottle was a fine gesture but under normal circumstances it would be presented at the home. Your travelling changed the timing but not the intent.

[Clockwork John]

... Your travelling changed the timing but not the intent.

Exactly!