I can kinda see what she's saying... kinda... I've posted here about my wife before, I believe, Alan, you repsonded to a few posts with some supportive words.

As far as self esteem goes, I agree. Self esteem can ONLY come from inside. I learned that a long time ago. Thats why its called SELF esteem. Can other people help it or hurt it? Of course. But they cannot fix it. If you have crappy self esteem, all the compliments in the world wont fix it. And if you have great self esteem, all the put-downs in the world wont hurt it.

Do I feel special in a kilt? Of course. I like the looks, the compliments, etc. Do the put downs discourage me? No way. (On a side note, the ONLY put downs I've heard yet are FROM my wife). I put on a kilt, I know I look good. I dont need someone to tell me I do. If someone says "Hey fag nice skirt" so what. I know I look good, they arent gonna hurt me. However, when I get a compliment, even though I am confident and feel good... it helps! Heck, I cant help but smile and say thanks, and feel good inside.

So, in my opinion, she's halfway right... you should feel 'special' inside first, but dammit... the attention does make that 'special' feeling a lot stronger, doesn't it?