I can see the biological reasons for hot water and clothes washing in a nursing home. But to tell you how you may dress off duty in a chapel is beyond the pale of civilized behavior.

I suggest in addition to whatever else you have in the works, go to this man's priest and have a very long talk to the preist about kilts, Christian charity, and the moral responsability of the Church to instill tolerance. If the priest fails to have a long talk with the board member, go to the Bishop.

It is being done in their name, they can fix it.