Dread,
Education is always an option. Even a local community college is available. If you really want that job in the Library, there is a degree for Library Sciences. Financial aid is available.

If a physical college is difficult, there are PLENTY of online degrees. Even well known colleges have online or continuing education courses. The Dallas County Community College Districts DCCCD. 9 Campuses around Dallas www.dcccd.edu offer a number of degrees you don't have to leave your computer chair for. Hone your creative skills with an art degree, or fashion merchandising.

Is there a Ren Faire near you? Scarborough Faire south of Dallas has a one man show of a pirate telling stories. He's been there a few years. I've watched a few. Always just little life lessons with some true life humor. With your look (with some added pirate garb), and knowledge that sounds like a seasonal opportunity. "When the priest turned to me and said, 'God looks down and smiles....the devil....". Your truisms that you add to people lives in small way on the boards here can be shared.

Just a thought.

True pirates don't abandon ship, so you can't give up yet.