So its the big 4th of July gig in our fair city's park. This means the normal "park drunks" have been displaced from the park by the festivities and they are not happy.

Park my car in the parking lot, as I'm walking through the gate to the park with a lady there are about five park drunks sitting or collapsed in the shade of a big cottonwood tree. One looks me up and down and shouts, "Nice skirt - but it would look better with high heels!"

Was wearing my new Texas Bluebonnett tartan with Teva sandals....

I thanked him for the compliment and pointed out that I already had a date - which sent his buddies laughing at him.

That's up there - but my top comment on a kilt is also from a drunk - "Hey Switzerland!"