"Dressing down a culture"

[Nathan]

I miss those days and I really hate it when men do not remove their hats at the dinner table.

I wish people could appreciate how ethnocentric this whole hats off in doors or at the table thing is. I understand the longing for days gone by with formality and manners, but many people wear the hat at the table as a sign of politeness and respect.

We aren't in a Christian only society and things aren't always as they appear. Just because someone has headdress on in doors, doesn't necessarily mean they are a boor without manners.

They might be Jewish or muslim...

[kiltedrennie]

Since you asked....

I'm very very very happy I do not wear a suit to work any longer. At best, it did nothing. At worst, it made for an uncomfortable day of programming. I still own one. I've worn it twice in the last eight years - to job interviews.

That being said, I would never wear PJs outside the home.

Cultures change.

[Jock Scot]

Nathan.

As someone who has no religious affiliations, I do hear what you say and I am sympathetic to cultures other than my own, but generally speaking "my house, my rules" and "your house, your rules" apply here. Now if a guest to my house has specific cultural reasons for doing something different then I hope reason will prevail, but there is no excuse for bad manners and slovenliness from wherever it comes.

[Nathan]

Nathan.

I hear what you say and I am sympathetic to cultures other than my own, but generally speaking "my house, my rules" and "your house, your rules" apply here. Now if a guest to my house has specific cultural reasons for doing something different then I hope reason will prevail, but-------.

Indeed. Reason should prevail. I agree with your sentiment here. I just think that given the diversity among which we all live now, people ought to give that a thought before they gasp and judge.

Getting back to the main thread, most people conform to the fashion of the day so even those with a desire to get "dressed up" are constantly asked, "what's the occasion?" and "why are you so dressed up?"

Many people choose their wardrobes to fit into a social group or attract a partner or keep a job. I enjoy fashion but have been called out for being a dandy on a few occasions. A golf shirt and khakis would not raise any eyebrows in a great many professional and casual social contexts nowadays.

I agree it's a pity and don't really play along, but I can't fault those that go with the flow.

[Duke of Delrio]

I agree with Jock's statement about slovenliness and bad manners . . .and go a bit further. Slovenliness is bad manners in any context, public or private. It disrespects any context into which it is introduced and disrespects all others upon whom it is thrust. I also believe this extends from manner of attire to manner of speech.

Public attire and public speech has become less a personal expression than a public statement of how little some care about the feelings of others. You can see and hear it at weddings, funerals, graduations and the list goes on.

Good manners is simply respect for those with whom we associate at work, in the neighborhood, and various occasions with differing levels of formality. There is no excuse to leave them behind when venturing out into the public square.

[creagdhubh]

Thanks for sharing the article. Below is a photo of how I preferred to dress, beginning in Kindergarten. I am pretty much the same way today. My parents would refer to me as a "little Alex P. Keaton," for those of you familiar with the 1980's American sitcom, Family Ties. I insisted that I always wore a tie to school, even when it really wasn't necessary to do so. I'm not sure where this mentality of "sartorial awareness" derived from, but it has stuck with me well into adulthood. I suppose there are worst things for a person to possess.

[cryptoman]

Slovenliness is bad manners in any context, public or private. It disrespects any context into which it is introduced and disrespects all others upon whom it is thrust. I also believe this extends from manner of attire to manner of speech.

Picking on people for the way they dress is the peak of bad manners as long as hygiene is applied. The same applies to hairsplitting. Expressing respect by the way you dress? It is the 21th century, bro.

[Nathan]

Picking on people for the way they dress is the peak of bad manners as long as hygiene is applied. The same applies to hairsplitting. Expressing respect by the way you dress? It is the 21th century, bro.

Citing the date isn't an argument. In my view, dressing appropriately for a given venue or event shows respect for your hosts/employer/ etc...

If you fail to dress appropriately for the occasion, you will rarely be called out on it because of the manners of others. This should not erroneously be construed as a tacit approval of one's choice of attire.

I say appropriately because indeed, one can also over dress, thereby making one's fellows feel self-conscious for no good reason or simply appearing pretentious or clueless.

If the context calls for radical self-expression or totally casual attire, go for it. If you feel like wearing shorts and a tank top to a wedding that calls for a suit, that's disrespectful.

Context is key. Caring about getting it right rather than expecting the world to adapt to your sartorial whims is indeed good manners and a sign of respect, even in the 21st Century, bro.

[Jock Scot]

Citing the date isn't an argument. In my view, dressing appropriately for a given venue or event shows respect for your hosts/employer/ etc...

If you fail to dress appropriately for the occasion, you will rarely be called out on it because of the manners of others. This should not erroneously be construed as a tacit approval of one's choice of attire.

I say appropriately because indeed, one can also over dress, thereby making one's fellows feel self-conscious for no good reason or simply appearing pretentious or clueless.

If the context calls for radical self-expression or totally casual attire, go for it. If you feel like wearing shorts and a tank top to a wedding that calls for a suit, that's disrespectful.

Context is key. Caring about getting it right rather than expecting the world to adapt to your sartorial whims is indeed good manners and a sign of respect, even in the 21st Century, bro.

+ 1 Nathan.

[R. Crosby]

Society has become a little more informal in the way people present themselves to the public but as a kilt wearer is there any way we can present ourselves without coming off as to formal? I think that would be the challenge to wearing a kilt.