The power of the kilt

Pittsburgh Kilts · 21st March 05, 09:59 AM

While wearing my kilt the other day, I dropped off my truck at the mechanic to be fixed. They couldn't do it while I waited, so since I didn't live far, I decided I'd just walk home.

On the way home, I stopped at the hardware store and bought a bucket and an anvil. Next, I stopped by the feed store and picked up a couple of chickens and a goose. However, I now had a problem, how to carry all of my purchases home.

The owner said, "Put the anvil in the bucket, carry the bucket in one hand, put a chicken under each arm and carry the goose in your other hand."

"Hey, thanks!" I said, and out the door I went.

But in the parking lot, I was approached by a hot young lady who told me she was lost. She asked, "Can you tell me how to get to 1603 Mockingbird Lane?"

I said, "Well, as a matter of fact, I live at 1616 Mockingbird Lane. Let's take my short cut and go down this alley. We'll be there in no time."

The lady looked me over cautiously, then said, "I am a lonely woman without a husband to defend me. How do I know that when we get in the alley you won't hold me against the wall, pull up your kilt, and ravish me?"

I said, "Holy smokes, Lady! I'm carrying a bucket, an anvil, two chickens, and a goose. How in the world could I possibly hold you up against the wall and do that?"

The lady said, "Set the goose down, cover him with the bucket, put the anvil on top of the bucket, and I'll hold the chickens."