jilted wife

[KiltedBishop]

I would guess (and I emphasize guess) that she feels threatened. In your kilt all these women come to you (regardless of whether it is 1 or 50) and give you attention, how can she compete? what you really need to do is first explain to her that Scots, Samurai, and a myriad of other extremely MANLY men wore kilts, and MUGS. But most importantly you need to look her square in the eye and saw something like "You are the only women whose opinions matter, the only one I want attention from." tell her you love her, only her and have no interest in anything else. often change fills people with fear. I am guessing you probably didn't get a lot of women coming up to you with your wife there making comments. this is new, now is wondering if she could lose you to one of them.
in short women feel threatened because most men are lead by our nether regions. just reaffirm your commitment to her, and do it often. She's your wife, don't blow off her feelings, address them and try to put them at ease. But don't be held hostage by them. either.

of course this is my opinion and I could very well be talking out my ****.

[Thistle Stop]

I would guess (and I emphasize guess) that she feels threatened. In your kilt all these women come to you (regardless of whether it is 1 or 50) and give you attention, how can she compete? what you really need to do is first explain to her that Scots, Samurai, and a myriad of other extremely MANLY men wore kilts, and MUGS. But most importantly you need to look her square in the eye and saw something like "You are the only women whose opinions matter, the only one I want attention from." tell her you love her, only her and have no interest in anything else. often change fills people with fear. I am guessing you probably didn't get a lot of women coming up to you with your wife there making comments. this is new, now is wondering if she could lose you to one of them.
in short women feel threatened because most men are lead by our nether regions. just reaffirm your commitment to her, and do it often. She's your wife, don't blow off her feelings, address them and try to put them at ease. But don't be held hostage by them. either.

of course this is my opinion and I could very well be talking out my ****.

You are exactly right. Women have a strong biological and psychological drive to seek security with a man. Every woman needs to feel her man is devoted to her and will not abandon her. I can take pleasure in another woman's admiration for my kilted man because I know he's committed to our marriage. If I didn't feel secure about that, it would cause problems in our relationship far beyond kilt-wearing!

One thing that means a lot to a woman is when her man shows her importance to him in public -- I don't mean in a kissy way, but putting an arm around her, opening doors for her, introducing her to people with obvious pride, etc. One of the most romantic and meaningful things Alan ever did for me was to come by the gym during one of my workouts (this was before my arthritis got bad, obviously!) to bring me a big bouquet of flowers, in front of everyone there. All the ladies clustered around asking if it was my birthday, etc., and Alan said it was no special occasion -- he just felt like giving me flowers because he loves me. Believe me, every woman there thought I was the luckiest girl alive, with the best husband ever! (Which may be true!) It was even more meaningful to me because I know he hates to buy cut flowers and considers it a real waste of money -- but he knows I love them! What great guy!

So, show her you love her and make it obvious to others. If you do a good job of that whenever you're kilted, you may find her encouraging you to put on your kilt! (But do it at other times too, of course!)

[bubba]

Y'know, thinking about it, I can see that. My wife feels very secure. We've always held hands when we walk together, "I love you" is a daily multiply used phrase. All those little gestures of caring and attention are commonplace in our marriage. Might be why my kilts don't bother her in the least and she can feel free to enjoy them along with me.

[Thistle Stop]

Y'know, thinking about it, I can see that. My wife feels very secure. We've always held hands when we walk together, "I love you" is a daily multiply used phrase. All those little gestures of caring and attention are commonplace in our marriage. Might be why my kilts don't bother her in the least and she can feel free to enjoy them along with me.

Right! I do believe we're onto something here! If kilted guys started to have the reputation of being the best, most loyal and caring husbands/boyfriends/partners around (as well as the most manly and sexy!), you would certainly get a lot of support from women for the kilt!

[Casey]

Bubba,

Bingo!

[KiltedBishop]

[Right! I do believe we're onto something here! If kilted guys started to have the reputation of being the best, most loyal and caring husbands/boyfriends/partners around (as well as the most manly and sexy!), you would certainly get a lot of support from women for the kilt!

Aren't we already?
I know...how do I remain modest with so much going for me? it isn't easy.

[Thistle Stop]

Right! I do believe we're onto something here! If kilted guys started to have the reputation of being the best, most loyal and caring husbands/boyfriends/partners around (as well as the most manly and sexy!), you would certainly get a lot of support from women for the kilt!

Aren't we already?
I know...how do I remain modest with so much going for me? it isn't easy.

With guys like you and my husband on the job, you're making a good start!

Maybe you should start a new movement... something like the Promise Keepers... the Promise-Keeping Clan of the Kilted?

[mikemisfit]

u know its funny-i just purchased a freedom kilt yesterday, dont have it yet (obviously) and already my g/f and i have issues over it lol. check this one guys and gals-she doesnt like kilted guys (the dress issue)BUT she knows alot of women do. the green monster bared its teeth and my kilt is a month away lol. its gonna be a long ride!

[Riverkilt]

Cindi, you're so right lady.

I marvel at these posts that pop up from time to time.

25 years ago my then wife got on her knees and begged me to go to counseling with her. I refused.

Today I are one...go figure, with a focus on marriage and family therapy....

If a couple came into my office for couple's counseling over the issue of the husband wearing the kilt I'd be looking for something much deeper that manifested as her discomfort with him being kilted.

In my own case I just met a new lady on line. We had a great first date, but she's observed that I'm a tad more wild and crazy than she is. On the second date she had no trouble enjoying the ease of access a kilt provides a hungry lady, yet she still says she's ill at ease getting used to being with me kilted in public. She's able to get a handle on it and says that she's spent her life being low key and a wallflower and here I am wearing a kilt, hair to my ****, a beard and lots of tattoos.

She's uncomfortable with her feeling that everywhere we go people look at us because of my kilt and long hair. She'd rather be ignored.

Luckily, she's willing to explore new things and is working on getting used to being around a "creature" like me in public.

Ironically, after our weekend picnic and pleasure follies we were hiking back to the truck when we passed a gaggle of polygamists hiking the other way to tend an old graveyard. Two "husbands" in fundamentalist Mormon dress and about six wives in pioneer dresses and bonnets, followed by about 15 or 20 little kids, the oldest about 9.

Suddenly my kilt didn't look so unusual to her. She moved out here from Ohio and this was her first look at polygamists on a family outing.

"Normal" is a setting on a clothes dryer.

Ron

[Galant]

I think it's all simply a matter of mentality. People just aren't used to seeing guys in 'skirts'. If you look at it, those who have the least problem or greatest appreciation are those with scottish ties or a love/knowledge of the culture. Then there's those who love and seek out other cultures in general, and you can go down the scale from there until you reach the opposite pole, people with not familiarity with kilts or understanding of history or other cultures.

Perhaps if she'd be willing to go to places or watch movies where she could be gradually exposed to it, her problems (ignorance perhaps?), would dissipate.