12 Steps for Kilt Wearers

**davedove** · 23rd June 05, 10:38 AM

The 12 step program for those who feel they are addicted to kilt:

The 12 Steps of
Kilt Addiction Recovery
1. We admitted we were powerless over the power of the kilt - that our lives had become better because of it.
2. Came to believe that a Power greater than ourselves has led us to the manliest of garments.
3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the freedom and comfort of the kilt.
4. Made a searching and fearless inventory of our kilt wearing lives.
5. Admitted to God, to ourselves, and to another human being that we are doing nothing wrong by wearing the kilt.
6. Were entirely ready to allow ourselves to wear a kilt on any occasion.
7. Humbly asked God to remove our fear of ridicule for wearing the kilt.
8. Made a list of all persons who have ridiculed our kilt-wearing, and become willing to accept their point of view without causing us to question ourselves.
9. Attempt to educate such people wherever possible about the benefits of wearing the kilt, without bringing further ridicule upon ourselves or anyone else.
10. Continued to exercise our personal rights and ignore the ridicule of others.
11. Sought through prayer and meditation to improve our conscious contact with God as we understood Him, praying only for the courage to fearlessly wear the kilt.
12. Having had a spiritual awakening as the result of these steps, we tried to carry this message to other kilt wearers, and to practice these principles in all our affairs.

Please note that I am not making light of anyone with a serious substance addiction problem. I wish you all the best in your personal struggle.

**Dreadbelly** · 23rd June 05, 10:43 AM

But those steps encourage kilt addiction, and do not aid in recovery. Those are enablers.

BAH!

**davedove** · 23rd June 05, 10:45 AM

That's the whole point - embrace the kilt!

**A Dhuglas** · 23rd June 05, 10:50 AM

I can hear it now...

Hi! My name's Dave and I'm a kiltaholic.

Hi Dave.

It's been three weeks since I last wore trows...

Good on ya Dave!
Atta boy!
Well done! Hang in there!
...

**Dreadbelly** · 23rd June 05, 10:55 AM

But enablers expressly imply that there is something wrong with said behaviour.

Wearing a kilt is no wrong... It's my God given right to set my balls free...

Hi.

I have not worn pants now for almost a whole year.

My trooser wearing companions keep trying to lure me back in...

**Jewddha** · 23rd June 05, 12:14 PM

Now THIS is the kind of support group I envisioned when I joined!

**GMan** · 23rd June 05, 12:59 PM

I am one with the kilt,
I am one with the kilt,
I am a happy kilted man!
I am a happy kilted man!
I embrace the kilted lifestyle.
I embrace the kilted lifestyle.
Life is good because I am kilted!
Life is good because I am kilted!

**Riverkilt** · 23rd June 05, 01:43 PM

Hey kiltmaker!....give me a couple more kilts!!...and a sporran chaser...make it quick!...jez...where'd I put them kilt hangers...heck with it...don't need no stinking hangers I'll wear 'em both...

S'all right...I can drive kilted....

Roooomzooom screech...

Hi honey, I'm home...no I'm okay....bring me another kilt though...

**Tatsudoshi** · 27th June 05, 07:23 PM

Yes, the power of the Kilt.
It truly is something that, just, well, overcomes you. Exhilarating...
The Kilt has taken me by storm, as I am now the proud owner of two Kilts, one is a casual lightweight in the blackwatch tartan that I have owned for almost three months now, My new Kilt is incredible, she's 16oz. strome wieght
in the Ancient Farquharson tartan all the way from Locharron in Scottland.
She arrived not but a few days ago.
This one is worn very proudly in memory of my Dad, who has now made his journey to the heavens.
If I could see my Dad's face right now I know there would be a great big smile on it.
May the Kilt be with you, alway's...

**Celticman** · 28th June 05, 04:45 AM

Originally Posted by Dreadbelly

But enablers expressly imply that there is something wrong with said behaviour.

Wearing a kilt is no wrong... It's my God given right to set my balls free...

Hi.

I have not worn pants now for almost a whole year.

My trooser wearing companions keep trying to lure me back in...

It is actually a 12 step program to free the balls from the clutches of trouser tyranny! The real addiction to overcome are trousers and, as clearly stated in step 3 (Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the freedom and comfort of the kilt), the kilt has the power!

So, to be more precise, would this new 12 step program be more appropriately called "Trousers Annonymous"?

:o