Advice/support regarding attitudes towards kilt-wearing

**Beery** · 21st January 06, 05:52 AM

Originally Posted by Alan H

What's NOT so much fun is if you're running into this....

People are calling you "crossdresser" or epithets for "homosexual" to your face, in a nasty, menacing tone of voice.

I wish they would come right out and say it. I find confrontation very easy to deal with. One thing is for sure, they wouldn't say it again because I'm not the sort of guy who suffers fools gladly, and I can out-menace pretty much anyone - when I'm angry I won't back down from anyone and I've faced down people twice my size. The biggest part of the problem for me is not being sure that they're idiots. If they would just say what's on their minds we could sort out their problems.

When you go to the store, all the people unashamedly stare at you like you're a space alien, and dangerous...not one or two not-so-bright peoploe...ALL the people.

Hehe, I had that yesterday. I went into my local liquor store to buy some beer and the clerk started staring and whispering to her coworker, then she actually looked out the window to check what sort of car I was driving - as if that would clue her in on what was going on, LOL. I just smiled and acted as if nothing odd was happening, but I felt like the guy in the movie 'The Station Agent' when he goes to the grocery store.

When you go to a restaurant or a pub, they won't serve you. So you go to another one and they won't serve you there, either.

I haven't had that happen yet. If that happens, there will be pub/restaurant staff who will become acquainted with my temper, and they will surely regret it, LOL.

**Jerry** · 21st January 06, 06:08 AM

i'm one of those here who is definitely NOT a full time kilt wearer. Until recently, I wore only at festivals and such.For one thing, I only had a couple of kilts. Now I'm soon to be up to 8, only 5 of which I even consider wearing out in public. My suggestion, if you are interested in wearing your kilt, get a Tartan kilt from Stillwater kilts.The Standard model will run you from 70 to 80 dollars and the economy will be between 40 and 45 dollars. Many people who haven't been to Celtic events don't recognize the UK as a kilt. All they know about kilts is that they are tartaned garments worn by Scotsmen. Get people used to seeing you in a tartan kilt, then bring out the UK again. Then people will probably ask about the UK and you can explain that it is a modern kilt, but sttill a man's garment just like a tartan kilt.

**davedove** · 21st January 06, 07:10 AM

If you're really having a problem with it, why don't you try easing into it a little slower. First, like it's been suggested, try getting an inexpensive tartan kilt like Stillwater. Then try going to a few Scottish/Irish/Celtic Festivals where others will also be kilted to build up your confidence in a friendly environment. Then start wearing it on special days, like St. Patrick's Day or National Tartan Day. All of these will help build up your confidence and get others used to seeing you kilted. Then just start wearing it on other days.

There will always be some people who look at you funny, and sometimes you may get some derogatory remarks. But the only way to get used to wearing the kilt is to wear it. I think everyone here will admit that wearing the kilt is doing something outside the societal norm, so you just have to accept that. The trick is to get comfortable being outside the norm.

**Mike n NC** · 21st January 06, 07:32 AM

Beery, everything you have mentioned to this point is coming from inside your head. Your perceptions of how people are perceiving you. Settle down, get out of your own head, carry yourself with confidence (doesn't mean staring anyone down) and get on with life... Shortly you will even forget you are wearing a kilt.

You think people stare at you like you are different...well if you want to wear a kilt you are different. Most of us are independent thinkers, non-conformists, intelligent if not well educated and for the most part, don't give a trouser about how others see us. I, and quite a few other members live in the southeast, the hotbed of American redneckism and we wear the kilt daily with few problems. In the past two years I have only experienced one truly negative encounter.

Since you are from Beantown, if all else fails tell them you are thinking of going to work as a frontman for DKM. :smile:

Mike

**Beery** · 21st January 06, 07:42 AM

Originally Posted by Mike n NC

Beery, everything you have mentioned to this point is coming from inside your head.

I have to disagree with you there. My wife has noticed it, so it's not just me.

I, and quite a few other members live in the southeast, the hotbed of American redneckism and we wear the kilt daily with few problems.

I would not naturally assume that conservatives or rednecks would be less accepting of the kilt. Rednecks and conservatives often have a strong sense of their national heritage. Liberals and progressives often less so.

**Robin** · 21st January 06, 07:52 AM

You think people stare at you like you are different...well if you want to wear a kilt you are different.

So true...it's an inevitable part of the deal!

enjoy! :mrgreen:

**Eujeankilt** · 21st January 06, 07:57 AM

Originally Posted by Mike n NC

Beery, everything you have mentioned to this point is coming from inside your head. Your perceptions of how people are perceiving you. Settle down, get out of your own head, carry yourself with confidence (doesn't mean staring anyone down) and get on with life... Shortly you will even forget you are wearing a kilt.
Mike

Beery,

The other side of this is that the reactions that you see are in THEIR heads. They are reacting to what they perceive as an anomaly in their world view. Your kilt challenges their cherished pattern of how the world should be. It's not personal. Once people have seen you several times, it becomes "normal" to see you kilted. Like many have said, when you don't don the kilt, they notice and wonder why you are wearing pants.

I tended to worry about what others thought of me. One of the lesser reasons I started wearing a kilt was to deliberately put myself outside the norm and draw attention to myself. It's been good practice and I definitely have more confidence. When I notice people looking at me I tend to walk taller and carry myself with pride. This all comes from within, not from anyone else.

Wear your kilt, man. They'll get over it, and if they don't, it's their problem.

Dale