Ouchy.......

[John M.]

they wouldn't look me in the eye for a few weeks afterwards

Nope, they were busy staring at the kilt in awe. As they now realize it's true power!

[davedove]

No doubt about it, that idiot should be kept out of the gene pool.

[Streetcar]

....my sister-in-law tended to be quite vocal in bed....My friend went to the door, and it was the police. One of the neighbors had called and told them my friend was "beating his wife" .

All right, I realize this is starting to hijack the thread, but this reminded me of a situation I was in a few years back.

I was on patrol, and had just pulled over a car full of gang-bangers in a high drug area. The car occupants were showing us plenty of attitude, so I had the driver step out of the car, away from his passengers. Tensions were pretty high with myself, my partner and certainly the gang-bangers.

Suddenly, from the second story of the house we had stopped in front of, we hear this woman moaning. Without getting too graphic, her words implied that she was praying, but the tone she was using suggested she had...less than worshipful intentions. We also heard her...prayer partner(?) joining in with her chorus.

Despite the bangers attempted posturing, and our attempts at a "formal police presence," we all started grinning. There were even a few giggles.
The tension was effectively released and the situation safely de-escalated.

No arrests, no tickets, and apparently no complaints.

[Graham]

He's lucky he didn't end up dead from the neck down, that fact that he's already dead from the neck up is evident.