A kangaroo dressed in a kilt goes into a bar and asks for a

[timber]

A priest and a rabbi walk into a bar. The bartender says "What is this, some kind of joke?"

[Eujeankilt]

Dyslexics of the world untie!

Dale

[Panache]

A piece of strings walks into a bar and the bartender looks at him and says "Hey we don't serve pieces of string here!" The piece of string leaves the bar. He roughs up the edge of his head so the individual fibers stick out, ties his head into a couple of loops, and walks back into the bar. The bartender looks at him and says "Didn't you hear me? I told you we don't serve pieces of string here!" The piece of string points to his head and says "afraid not".

Cheers

[Richland]

A horse Walks into a bar: Bartender says "Why the long face!"

[Big Dave]

A skeleton walks into a bar and asks the bartender for a "beer and a mop".

[MacSimoin]

A horse Walks into a bar: Bartender says "Why the long face!"

That's a good one. I like this version better:

Celine Dion walks into a bar. The bartender looks at her and asks, "Why the long face?"

[Ruanaidh]

Into the bar walk a C, a E flat and a G. The bartender says “Sorry, we don’t serve minors”.

[Rex_Tremende]

There are only 10 kinds of people in the world:
Those who get binary and those who don't.

[kilted in kleaveland]

Two guys walk into a bar
the third one ducks

[Southern Breeze]

A seal walks into a bar and asks for anything but club soda.