Newfoundland

[ccga3359]

One Canadian girl I met years ago seemed to have an inexhaustible number of Newfie jokes--they just about mirrored the Polish jokes that used to be common before Political Correctness sensitivities banished the lot.

We're PC but we still have Newfie jokes, also Quebec jokes. Newfie jokes used to be akin to the Polish jokes in the States and Irish jokes in England. As Colin mentioned, "they are Canadian whether they like it or not" is due to the fact that they joined the Confederation in 1947 before that they were a very independant British colony.

[Sean_the_Kilted]

We're PC but we still have Newfie jokes, also Quebec jokes. Newfie jokes used to be akin to the Polish jokes in the States and Irish jokes in England. As Colin mentioned, "they are Canadian whether they like it or not" is due to the fact that they joined the Confederation in 1947 before that they were a very independant British colony.

It was actually in 1949 that they joined the confederation.

[ccga3359]

It was actually in 1949 that they joined the confederation.

You are correct, my bad I thought I typed that. Needless to say many a Newfoundlander curses Joey Smallwood... Rumour has it that they dug up his corpse and did something with it.

[slohairt]

When my parents and I emigrated to Canada we moved to St. John's, Newfoundland. (I think we were the first immigrants they'd had since the 19th Century!) Newfoundland is often referred to as the most Irish place outside of Ireland, so it seemed a natural choice to them. In fact, it has its own unique name in Irish, Talamh an Éisc meaning Land of the Fish. In addition, Newfoundland had its own dialect of the Irish language which only recently died out.

When my dad got his first job in St. John's, he came home one day and commented to my mother that there were many people at his work from County Waterford. My mother said that would be nice in case he felt homesick. A few days later, my dad asked one of his co-workers how long he had been here, to which the man replied, "Oi'm fram de Rock, b'y!" My father thought this may have been some unfamiliar area in Co. Waterford, and simply nodded. The man then asked, "An' ye?" My father answered, "I'm from Donegal." The man scratched his head, and said, "Ne'er heared o' it, buddy."
It took my father some time to realise that The Rock is Newfoundland!

We stayed for a couple of years, my sister was born there, and then we moved to Ontario. There are a number of Newfoundlanders in my area (indeed many in my apartment building), most are great people, while others do something of a discredit to their province.

Newfoundland, being one the oldest colonies in North America, has a very rich history and culture. Much of that history is sad, and it is a testament to the Newfoundland people that they have trudged on. Yes, they joined Confederation in 1949, but they were a British Dominion (like Canada), not a colony anymore by that point. They simply had had their home rule suspended.

[cloves]

We consider you to be a Newfie cloves, because you're so awsome.

hrmmmm.....i'm not exactly sure if this a compliment...?

[DarkFlame]

Hello everyone,

Tonight by chance I went online in hopes to look up Newfoundland Irish jokes, and it brought me to this site for some odd reason. So for some reason I decided to read through these posts as it dealt with Newfoundland.
I am a Newfoundlander, and I just to clear some rumours that had been posted up here.

The user "slohairt" post is one hundred percent true, it is known and also written that we have the most Irish place outside of Ireland. We share much of the same dialect, dance, traditions, even music. We even have festivals that deal with Ireland. Something like a 100 Irish come here and tell is more things about our culture, and a 100 of us go there to learn and experience more of thier culture. Sadly because some of our culture is beginning to die out. For example, to this day we have to learn proper english as that is the mother tongue of Canada. (Not that it is a bad thing at all, however we are the only canadians that have our own dictionary because we have our own type of language.)

Much respect and thanks to slohairt for filling people in about Newfoundland.

By the way ccga3359 that rumour you heard about us digging up Joey Smallwoods body, that is a lie. We didn't even try to do that.
Though it is true that most of us dislike the fact that we joined Canada, but for various reasons, not because we didn't like Canada itself. The majority of Newfoundlander derived from European places, and we just rather to of stayed with Europe. To this day because for various reasons, we still wish to become our own republic of Newfoundland.

[CDNSushi]

I love Newfies! A couple of my best friends are from there. I had a roommate back in college from the Rock -- his name was Steve Monster. Craziest bugger I ever met! Loads of fun! I could tell you stories (most of which would not be appropriate to be told in public)...

Anyway, to celebrate our kin to the East, here's some Newfie jokes for ya!

The Newfie and the Genie

A drunk Newfie was stumbling home one day when he got lost and found himself in the bush. He fell to the ground and noticed a lamp. He picked it up, and rubbed it, and out came a genie.

"You have three wishes, choose them wisely." says the Genie.

The Newfie, looking down at his last, and empty, bottle of beer, smashes it on some rocks and says, "I want a beer that will never run out."

A bottle appears in front of the Newfie. He takes it, looks at it, and downs it. He looks at it again, and to his surprise, it was still full. The Newfie being very content starts walking away.

"Where are you going," asks the Genie, "You still have two wishes left!"

"Well," replies the Newfie, "Give me TWO more of these!"

Tiger Woods in Newfoundland

Sent on a golf tour in Newfoundland, Tiger Woods drives his new Ford Fusion into a petrol station in a remote part of the countryside. The pump attendant, obviously knows nothing about golf, greets him in a typical Newfoundlander manner completely unaware of who the golfing pro is.

"Top of the mornin' to yer, sir" says the attendant.

Tiger nods a quick "hello" and bends forward to pick up the nozzle. As he does so, two tees fall out of his shirt pocket onto the ground.

"What are dose?" Asks the attendant.

"They're called tees," replies Tiger.

"Well, what on God's earth are dey for?" inquires the attendant.

"They're for resting my balls on when I'm driving", says Tiger.

"Laird thunderin Jaises!", exclaims the Newfoundlander, "Ford tinks of everyting!"


Newfie Love Poem

SUSIE TOBIN FELL IN LOVE;
SHE PLANNED TO MARRY JOE
SHE WAS SO 'APPY 'BOUT IT ALL
SHE TOLD HER PAPPY SO.

PAPPY TOLD HER, SUSIE, MAID,
YOU'LL HAVE TO FIND ANUDDER.
I'D JUST AS SOON YOUR MA DON'T KNOW,
BUT JOE IS YOUR 'ALF BRUDDER.

SO SUSIE PUT ASIDE HER JOE
AND PLANNED TO MARRY WILL,
BUT AFTER TELLING PAPPY THIS,
HE SAID, "DERE'S TROUBLE STILL.

YOU CAN'T MARRY WILL, MY DEAR,
AND PLEASE DON'T TELL YOUR MUDDER,
BUT WILL AND JOE, AND SEVERAL MO'
I KNOWS IS YOUR 'ALF BRUDDER.

BUT MUDDER KNEW AND SAID, MY CHILD,
JUST DO WHAT MAKES YOU 'APPY.
MARRY WILL OR MARRY JOE.
YOU HAIN'T NO KIN TO PAPPY.

[Jack Daw]

Right after WWII, my dad was stationed (U.S. Navy) in Newfoundland. My dad is gone now, but he told me a few things about NFLD, but not everything - he failed to tell me any stories involving screech. My mother spent two years of early married life with my father there. All she remembers is trying to dry my oldest brother's diapers in the freezing, treeless cold, and that the people were the greatest.

[Scully]

I would suggest that you go to newfoundland, because you don't need a reason. I took a Carnival crusie there and had a wonderful time. I spent the whole day walking all over St John. The dock side of the city is covered with historic sites. the food is grand. The best part is that the ship was piped in and out of port.

I still want to go back.
There is another reason to go and that is they have a proper road rally every year. they drive all over the island.

good place for a vacation.

[macwilkin]

Information: The Royal Newfoundland Regiment was the only North American unit to serve in the Gallipoli Campaign during WWI.

If Gallipoli wasn't enough, the regiment took heavy casualities on the first day of the Somme, 1 July 1916.

http://www.heritage.nf.ca/greatwar/a.../regiment.html

Lest we forget!

Todd