My deepest sympathy, wouldn't even know where to begin or what to suggest. It isn't right for them to interfere like this but the situation must be handled delicately. It sounds like they are trying to help but going about it in a very wrong manner. Unfortunatly sometimes dealing with family is more difficult than dealing with strangers. I would let them know that what she did if not right and unexceptable, that you are an adult and this not the way to handle a situation.Let us know what happens.