Different strokes for different folks....my late mother found joy in my wearing kilts in her clan tartan.

Pretty difficult to set up any sort of boundary with your mother...near impossible.

On her side "stealing" your kilts (taking your toys away until you behave) is about as effective as trying to sober up an alcoholic by pouring their booze down the sink.

She didn't cause your kilt purchases, she can't control your kilt purchases, and she can't cure you of purchasing kilts.

So...you're both kinda at a stalemate. No fun. And, as Mike1 has pointed out the wrong moves can only exacerbate an already delicate situation.

Seems maybe she's operating from a shame base...i.e. your wearing kilts brings shame on our family. Education seems the proper antidote for kilt shame. Course, she'd have to be open minded enough to listen.

If this is an LDS thing, maybe tell her about kilts and pipe bands becoming popular in Nauvoo (? spelling)...or there's just GOTTA be a few Scotsmen in your family tree.

Sometimes, when treated unfairly, the best thing to do is not respond...just sit in it...let it go (not easy, takes courage) and eventually maybe just leaving it hanging will get her to return the kilts....or not.

What a difficult situation she created...a real chess player that lady.

Ron