A little ticked....

[celtic cowboy]

Tonight I was talking with my mother, I was informed that this year the whole family will be going out for Thanksgiving dinner, first off I was not happy about this as I am big on big dinners for holiday's. Also I do the bird so all that is left is sides. Well I guess no one wants to use their house and our place is just to small, so we are going to what was explained by my Mom as being "Fancy", so when I asked if I needed to wear a jacket or if just dress shirt and tie were fine, my mother then added " and pants". She then informed me that she promised my niece and nephew that I "Would!" wear pants. To this I replied "Have a nice meal", then she walked off. So gang did I handle this right or not. My brother refuses to admit that our family even came form Scotland, and has told his kids that we are not Scottish and that real Scots do not wear kilts. He believes that nothing happed in history prior to the Cival War, and gives me the "Skirt" comment all the time. I am proud and as some of the pics I have posted have shown you can all see that my wife and I are bringing up our son to be proud of his Scot/Irish family history, and also to be proud of the kilt and what it means. Sorry for the long rant. Just needed to vent.

[Larry124]

To me the importance of family occasions overrides many things.
Yes even maybe with some bickering and all tha’.
I’d enjoy the family gathering and leave the kilt at home.

[cavscout]

Ya know, the "high road" and "bigger man" answer is to leave the kilt at home and attend the dinner in peace.

However, I don't like heights and I don't need to be the bigger man so I think you did just fine. If the event is being held at a restaurant who are they to dictate what you will wear? Can you demand that all the women wear dresses? Their request is totally inappropriate.

I would though invite your Mother (Parents) over for a small family dinner if you so desire. Making the gesture will be good enough. Wasn't sure if your mother was anti-kilt and involved in the ultimatum.

[ThistleDown]

To me the importance of family occasions overrides many things.
Yes even maybe with some bickering and all tha’.
I’d enjoy the family gathering and leave the kilt at home.

I think I would, too, if the gathering were in my mother's or my brother's home, or if it were my mother's or my brother's birthday we were celebrating, but I think, CC, that you are questioning "control". You said "our place is too small". How does your "our" feel about all this?

[Panache]

Ultimately what is more important, a garment or family?

Cheers

Jamie

[Nighthawk]

Personally, I would insist that all the women wear dresses, as pants are men's clothes, and I would not want to be seen with cross dressing women. But then, I have a "kiss my a**" attitude towards stupid people anyway, and refusing to learn or act correctly based on knowledge you already have is to me the very deffinition of stupidity. I have neither time, nor patience, for stupid people.

[Kilted Surveyor]

Ultimately what is more important, a garment or family?

My lovely bride and I have a saying: "It is a good thing you can pick your friends, because you can't pick your family"

My brother gives me grief EVERY time I wear my kilt to a family function, but I still wear it. He's still my brother, and I'd still walk through hell in a gasoline suit for him, but is still wear the kilt.

In my opinion, it was ludicrous to give an ultimatum without approaching you with a little bit of tact. In my humble, newbie opinion, you handeled it right. If your brother gets mad and leaves, that's his problem. Hope I didn't cross the line. Good luck with your decision.

[###KILTEDKIWI###]

brother refuses to admit that our family even came form Scotland, and has told his kids that we are not Scottish and that real Scots do not wear kilts. He believes that nothing happed in history prior to the Cival War, and gives me the "Skirt" comment all the time.

If you dont know where your from, how the hell do you know where you are going?????

[ardchoille]

Wear your kilt with pride, I say. Those who mind won't matter.. and those who matter won't mind.

[gilmore]

...
In my opinion, it was ludicrous to give an ultimatum without approaching you with a little bit of tact. ...

So many times when some one posts here about family members not wanting a man to wear a kilt, it seems so obvious that there are other issues at play and the kilt is only a manifestation of them, and a somewhat superficial one at that.

I really don't know enough about these other issues to give advice, and don't know that I would presume to if I did. But I will say that perhaps objections by family members to a man's wearing a kilt sometimes show that it's time to take a look at family dynamics, and how we respond to them. Sometimes we need to discuss what is really going on, rather than acting out our issues. Sometimes we need to learn to set boundaries. Sometimes we need to move to the other side of the world to get away from psychotic family members and then go into years of therapy to repair the damage they have done.