How should XMTS grow and improve?

[DWFII]

The point of this thread was to see if we needed some updates or improvements.

Hank (highlandtide) the owner of this site has been following the thread and some of the suggestions that have been offered here are going to lead to some changes.

They aren't going to be earthshaking ones but hopefully that will all contribute to making XMTS more enjoyable and useful.

Stay tuned...

Cheers

Jamie

BTW, on the issue of changing the sub-forum to Traditional Highland Dress...Thank you for that! That was a very welcome and well considered change. And illustrates a degree of wisdom that I have come to expect from the mods.

[Alan H]

I've seen the ignore feature, but have never used it on anyone. There have been people over the years I would have liked to, but I just glaze over those posts as people do have good input and I don't really want to go to the trouble or the effort to actually ignore someone.

That's a good outlook, or at the least, it's an outlook that works for you. It doesn't work for me, I'm afraid.

As for the "trouble" and "effort" it takes, the process of putting someone on "ignore" takes about fifteen seconds, depending on your internet connection speed. It's reversible in about the same amount of time. OK, it might take 60 seconds, the first time, while you're figuring it out!

I'm not saying that it's a good idea to trot around and "ignore" masses of people. After all, if we all thought the same, it'd be boring, right? However, the feature is there and if using the feature makes X Marks a more pleasant experience for someone, then they should use it. I'm proposing a very slight modification to how that feature works, if it's possible. That's it.

The flip side to this is learning how to accept the fact that each of us may be on other peoples "ignore" lists. I fully expect that I am on a few peoples "ignore" lists. That doesn't mean I think they are bad people, or hateful, or anything. If using the feature makes X marks a more enjoyable experience for them, then that's great. It's not gonna *kill* me to be on a couple of peoples "ignore" list.

[Panache]

BTW, on the issue of changing the sub-forum to Traditional Highland Dress...Thank you for that! That was a very welcome and well considered change. And illustrates a degree of wisdom that I have come to expect from the mods.

It is a minor shift that will hopefully make things easier for people.

If you are talking about just a kilt (any kind of kilt) or kilted experience you can use the General Kilt Talk forum.

If you want to talk specifically about Modern kilted fashion we have The Contemporary & Non-Traditional Kilts forum.

If you want to talk about Traditional / Classic attire there is the Traditional Highland Dress forum

The key to making these work is a bit of restraint and a bit of understanding.

If you will, imagine that these forums are "rooms" at the house XMTS, and they all have glass walls. Everybody sees what everyone else is doing.

If someone starts a thread in the "modern" section and right off the bat insults traditional kilted style then they can expect that (because they brought up the subject) there are going to be some traditionalists with a different opinion who have the right to voice them.

Likewise if in the traditional forum starts insulting modern kilts, guess what, this is an invitation for modern kilt wearers to defend themselves.

Also when you talk about traditional / classic highland attire it is a good thing to realize that their are older traditions, newer traditions, military traditions, etc. Debating the merits or origins of them is fine. Insulting one or another of them or denying that it is a style / tradition isn't.

The big thing is to realize that as a group we have an wonderful range of experiences here among our membership from the oldest and staunchest of traditional style to the most cutting edge of kilted fashion.

That is amazing to have all under one roof.

We are all better off trying to promote what each one of us knows and likes with thoughtful and respectful posts instead of belittling that which we don't.

I don't know about the rest of you, but I'm interested in those that are positive in what they are doing and define themselves by who they are and what they do, instead of those who only establish themselves by pointing out that they are not.

A little respect goes a long way

Just my two cents.

Cheers

Jamie

[Colin]

That's a good outlook, or at the least, it's an outlook that works for you. It doesn't work for me, I'm afraid.

As for the "trouble" and "effort" it takes, the process of putting someone on "ignore" takes about fifteen seconds, depending on your internet connection speed. It's reversible in about the same amount of time. OK, it might take 60 seconds, the first time, while you're figuring it out!

I'm not saying that it's a good idea to trot around and "ignore" masses of people. After all, if we all thought the same, it'd be boring, right? However, the feature is there and if using the feature makes X Marks a more pleasant experience for someone, then they should use it. I'm proposing a very slight modification to how that feature works, if it's possible. That's it.

The flip side to this is learning how to accept the fact that each of us may be on other peoples "ignore" lists. I fully expect that I am on a few peoples "ignore" lists. That doesn't mean I think they are bad people, or hateful, or anything. If using the feature makes X marks a more enjoyable experience for them, then that's great. It's not gonna *kill* me to be on a couple of peoples "ignore" list.

I can appreciate that Alan. By effort and work, I simply mean that 15 seconds or 15 minutes is too much effort for me to put someone on an ignore list when I can simply not look at those threads or let them get to me.

Agreed it's what works for me, but as someone who was a moderator on this site for a number of years and one that has had more than a few "F*** You!!" PMs sent my way or complaints about everything people feel is wrong with the site or with the people that help run it I still have never added anyone to my ignore list. I was here for many of the issues that created many bitching opportunities for the "wronged, but done no wrong" few that used those opportunities to slam myself, the fellow staff, and I site we all worked hard on both here and on other sites I used to enjoy. I could have hit ignore a hundred times (okay maybe about 10-12) and not dealt with any of it, but still choose to focus on the positive.

We know that it's harder to to get a message online without tone, inflection, or humour so who knows when something is taken the wrong way (yes, we are a sensitive bunch). There is a positive to everyone and it's just how it is taken or presented online that can attract or annoy others. Someone I disagreed with once may be a strong ally on another topic in the future. If others wish to use that ignore tool than that's their prerogative. I think it's hard to have a community that can, like in life, decide who they want to discuss things with and who to filter out on their own accord simply by not paying attention. Their are no "ignore" options in life, work, school, so why use it on a web site where we already have the option to move past anything.

Anyway, that's just my opinion. I am sure the moderators will look at some of the great suggestions here and improve on an already great site....or they will add me to their ignore list.

[DWFII]

I'm sure I'm on no few ignore lists but I never use the feature myself...it's a matter of principle.

As a "teacher" for lo these many years, I have learned a good many things but among them is the notion that if you cannot "bend the knee" to someone you want or need to learn from, you'll never be a teacher yourself. You may not even be able to "learn," in the strictest sense, at all.

I have also found that it is rare to meet someone, no matter how distasteful their ethical or political perspectives (or fill in a reason to ignore)...that I cannot learn something from. Sometimes the most valuable lessons come at us from our "blind side."

When I was a teenager I had lots of folks on my "ignore list." I can't say I benefited much from it.

[DWFII]

deleted

[Alan H]

I can appreciate that Alan. By effort and work, I simply mean that 15 seconds or 15 minutes is too much effort for me to put someone on an ignore list when I can simply not look at those threads or let them get to me.

Agreed it's what works for me, but as someone who was a moderator on this site for a number of years and one that has had more than a few "F*** You!!" PMs sent my way or complaints about everything people feel is wrong with the site or with the people that help run it I still have never added anyone to my ignore list. I was here for many of the issues that created many bitching opportunities for the "wronged, but done no wrong" few that used those opportunities to slam myself, the fellow staff, and I site we all worked hard on both here and on other sites I used to enjoy. I could have hit ignore a hundred times (okay maybe about 10-12) and not dealt with any of it, but still choose to focus on the positive.

We know that it's harder to to get a message online without tone, inflection, or humour so who knows when something is taken the wrong way (yes, we are a sensitive bunch). There is a positive to everyone and it's just how it is taken or presented online that can attract or annoy others. Someone I disagreed with once may be a strong ally on another topic in the future. If others wish to use that ignore tool than that's their prerogative. I think it's hard to have a community that can, like in life, decide who they want to discuss things with and who to filter out on their own accord simply by not paying attention. Their are no "ignore" options in life, work, school, so why use it on a web site where we already have the option to move past anything.

Anyway, that's just my opinion. I am sure the moderators will look at some of the great suggestions here and improve on an already great site....or they will add me to their ignore list.

I think that moderators kind of have an obligation to NOT ignore anybody, much as they might want to, and OH YEAH, I bet you all have LOTS of reasons to want to block certain people out! I can only imagine!

For my part, I do not have the ability to simply not get annoyed at posts that I see that I feel violate certain basic principles. Note that I say "that I FEEL" ! I don't want to get into a big fight over them, I don't want to be a jerk on the boards, I don't want to engage in endless arguments, but yet I want to have an enjoyable experience at X Marks. So for me it's just easier to use the feature and carry on. I look at it this way... I could NOT use the feature and get upset, or get really angry and resentful towards people who almost certainly are basically pretty decent people...OR....I could turn on the feature and carry on and NOT get really angry and resentful.

Now, this is just me, and certainly not everybody should use, or wishes to use the feature. Anyway, enough said on the topic, at least by me, anyway.

[Bugbear]

Now people are going to be roaming the forum wondering, "Am I on that guy's ignore list?" Perhaps a minus sighn should be by the names of those members who have put you on the ignore list, like the plus by the friends and contacts.

[pdcorlis]

I'd like to respond to you Alan - but unfortunately you're on my ignore list

Kidding...

[Bugbear]

The forum could send out an automated notice that you have been put on So And So's ignore list.

Sorry. It just seems so funny. I tested it, and it is not possible to put a Mod on the ignore list, if anyone was wondering.