So...you must play the bagpipes?

[Snowbear]

I play pipes now, but back when I did'nt play I just stared down at my kilt, then looked at them saying "No, I get other ones to do it for me" with a big smile. That usually opend up a bit.

[wvpiper]

Sorry, but I just don't see it as this great thing to be insulted over.

T.

I agree. We're in America, and Americans most associate the kilt with pipers.
It is what it is. No need to get 'snappy' or bent out of shape.
Take the time to educate them on why you wear it, if you wish.

I do like the t-shirt from the tartan museum, though.

[Colonel MacNeal]

When I wear my kilt and I'm asked if I plat the bagpipes, I tell people "No, I like to stay at least on speaking terms with my neighbors". This usually gets a giggle.

Not to mention the baying from the neighborhood dogs. My dog loves them though and will follow behind the piper's heels.

[The Kilted Reverend]

"Yes I do........on C.D."

Slainte,
TKR

[Makeitstop]

"No, the banjo" (or accordion, kazoo, tambourine, didgeridoo, etc.)

"Yes. By law anyone wearing a kilt must play bagpipes. We must also be cheap, eat haggis, and have an unsettling fondness for sheep. Now if you'll excuse me I have to paint my face blue and go moon some Englishmen"

"I used to, but it got all commercial and it stopped being about the music. I couldn't stand the thought of my art being part of some corporate machine, so I burned them and swore never to play again." (the longer and more over the top you make this story, the better)

"No, I just strangle cats."

Or when it's more of a conversation on the topic and not just a random question, I will explain that the bagpipes are one of the hardest instruments to play in the world, and that I an barely handle a kazoo. And since poorly played bagpipes sound like a cat being strangled with a goose, its probably for the best that I not even try.

[lethearen]

Today's the first time I've worn my kilt to work. People actually interested will ask about my family, about my tartan, etc.

People who aren't interested and just feel like being wise-apes ask about my bagpipes. Surprised that it's the number one question I get? ;)

I just tell them that I don't think the fiancée or neighbours would appreciate the skirls and walk away. They assume I'm mispronouncing "squirrels" and are left confused

[Wompet]

"What I do can't really be called playing" - my standard response.