Haggis............. The Truth

[Scolpaig]

Nothing to do with the Kilt but most certainly Scottish.

Thought this might make your members smile.

http://www.ccsinverness.ndo.co.uk/haggis.html

[Lallans]

So, which came first, the referenced article or the little tribble-like Haggis creatures they sell at my local Scottish theme shops?

And the notion of the uneven legged creature that lives on hillsides, reflected in the stories of the legendary Sidehill Wompahoofus of my Appalachian childhood, is that ancient Celtic lore from the Highlands or did it start here and end up there? And finally, why do I always have to read about haggis without having the chance to eat some? Mmmmmm, haggis!

[Scolpaig]

Well Canuck of NI, what can I tell you?

It appears you have fond memories of Haggis as furry Tribble like creatures or even as the uneven-legged "Sidehill Wompahoofus". (I must look into this as it may be evidence of a possible hiccup in Haggis evolution.) Once, I too, held similar romantic notions of cute, furry, three legged creatures skipping and dancing on lowland hillsides as the evening sun sank slowly into the sea beyond Scotland's western shores. But unfortunately a chance meeting with a wee man in a tartan bunnet, drunkenly mopping the black and white tiled floor of a Glasgow public toilet, was destined to change my life.

Before I reveal more to you sir, I have questions..... Is it really my place to take your treasured memories and render them asunder? Can you handle the reality? Would you even believe the hardships and dangers we had to endure, the ridicule from our peers when they discovered our whole expedition was based on the ramblings of a blind-drunk, public toilet attendant. Is it possible for you to appreciate the despair we felt after hacking our way through twenty years of bramble growth dressed only in kilts and string vests just to discover there was another, easier, route?

I say to you sir. When you can accept what we went through and weep real, alcohol induced tears for our suffering, then and only then, will I reveal more of the truths of "Ancient Scrolls of Haggyrr".

Scolpaig.

[lethearen]

Saw this article regarding a survey taken in Britain...

http://www.reuters.com/article/idUST...ddlyEnoughNews

[sfb]

Ooh - good find lethearen. "One in five people in Britain thinks that haggis, the traditional Scottish dish made from the lung, liver and heart of a sheep, is an animal that roams the Highlands, according to a survey on Friday."

In fairness, given a free choice, I'd probably prefer to believe the second option myself.

On a separate note, I'm pleased I've so far managed to resist the temptation to click on the link to the "Police barred from penis enlargement" story. I'll not deny that it's piqued my interest though.

[Bigkahuna]

It's amazing what steroid injections will do even for a haggis!!! According to the Guinness Book of World Records, the largest Haggis ever taken was one of over 200lbs, taken with a 10 gauge over&under Beretta, by a Lord Farquar in 1983.

[Lallans]

Well Canuck of NI, what can I tell you?

It appears you have fond memories of Haggis as furry Tribble like creatures or even as the uneven-legged "Sidehill Wompahoofus". (I must look into this as it may be evidence of a possible hiccup in Haggis evolution.) Once, I too, held similar romantic notions of cute, furry, three legged creatures skipping and dancing on lowland hillsides as the evening sun sank slowly into the sea beyond Scotland's western shores. But unfortunately a chance meeting with a wee man in a tartan bunnet, drunkenly mopping the black and white tiled floor of a Glasgow public toilet, was destined to change my life.

Before I reveal more to you sir, I have questions..... Is it really my place to take your treasured memories and render them asunder? Can you handle the reality? Would you even believe the hardships and dangers we had to endure, the ridicule from our peers when they discovered our whole expedition was based on the ramblings of a blind-drunk, public toilet attendant. Is it possible for you to appreciate the despair we felt after hacking our way through twenty years of bramble growth dressed only in kilts and string vests just to discover there was another, easier, route?

I say to you sir. When you can accept what we went through and weep real, alcohol induced tears for our suffering, then and only then, will I reveal more of the truths of "Ancient Scrolls of Haggyrr".

Scolpaig.

OK, I'll bite- as it were. At the risk of spoiling my appetite for all time, reveal all.

[Seanmhair]

Ahh, the Haggis! While in the ninth grade (about age 13) my son was asked by a Social Studies teacher for a list of comfort foods. Top of his list was Haggis!

Now 26, he has eaten Haggis every year or two at a Burns dinner but it had been a while since I had cooked one so last year when I asked what he wanted for Thanksgiving dinner, beef or turkey, he replied again "Haggis!"

After several months of searching, we finally had a successful hunt and he was able to retrieve one just in time for January 25th! The Flatland West Texas Haggis is truly rare but not extinct!

[Pleater]

It's amazing what steroid injections will do even for a haggis!!! According to the Guinness Book of World Records, the largest Haggis ever taken was one of over 200lbs, taken with a 10 gauge over&under Beretta, by a Lord Farquar in 1983.

Ah now - that is evolution in action - I suspect that the escaped wild boar now roaming the country have a lot to do with the alteration in size.

Having developed a taste for wild boar only the largest haggii survive the encounters, but they and their offspring are able to feast on the boar they bring down, so increasing their size and ensuring ever greater success in the hunting.

Anne the Pleater :ootd:

[Lallans]

If the haggis is in genetic flux, I hope you will bring the following narrative to the attention of Scottish authorities- it tells the sad story of how the Appalachian sidehill wampahoofus overspecialized and mutated to the point of extinction. That is in Vermont, of course- they still abound, much as ever they did, across the Canadian border, where I'm from:

The Wampahoofus: A Sad Evolutionary Tale (10/04)
By Maeve Kim

My dad was a native Vermonter who was a Long Trail end-to-ender and hiked every side trail around Mt. Mansfield many, many times. He used to tell the following story about the legendary wampahoofus, the namesake of the beautiful trail on the flanks of Mansfield.

The wampahoofus was a large mammal, now extinct, that some say resembled a moose-gnu hybrid. Its worldwide range was limited to part of Mt. Mansfield, usually between 2600 and 3200 feet up.

Like many large mammals, the males and females didn’t have much to do with each other except during the period of the year devoted to courtship and mating. The rest of the year, the males wandered around Mt. Mansfield in a clockwise direction, grazing and enjoying the scenery, never descending into the valleys, never climbing to the very highest elevations. Females spent a few months a year in the higher reaches of Nebraska Notch, nursing their calves. (My dad’s great-grandfather recalled coming across five of the ungainly cows, each caring for one nursing calf. Quite a sight.) Most of the year, though, the females walked around Mansfield at a high level, although never on the ridgeline. Unlike the male, the female wampahoofus always went around the mountain in a counterclockwise direction. When males and females met at the wrong time of the year, they passed each other without a second look. At the right time of year, of course, they mated.

Now, after hundreds of generations of walking laterally across a slope, the legs of the wampahoofus adapted. The males, who went around the mountain in a clockwise direction, developed shorter right legs than left legs. The females, after eons of counterclockwise perambulation, began to grow shorter left legs than right legs.

This unusual evolutionary adaptation worked fine for many generations – but unfortunately, the uneven leg gene appeared to be dominant. The males’ right legs kept getting shorter and shorter, as did the females’ left legs. Eventually, when a couple met to mate, things just didn’t fit. The wampahoofus died out. Vermont – and the world – lost a truly unique creature.

To visit the Wampahoofus Trail, climb the Butler Lodge Trail from the Stevensville Trailhead in Underhill Center. Follow the trail around the back of the Lodge, pass the start of the Rock Garden Trail, and you’ll be traversing the haunts of the wondrous beast.

This is pasted from the site http://www.naturecompass.org/gmcburl.../0410wamp.html

-so it must be true.