Wore trews on first date

[Lyle1]

Eh...how much intolerance would you really want to put up with anyway?
If they are that hung up on that one little thing...makes me wonder what else?

Sorry it didn't work..

I agree. Her reaction and comments went beyond rudeness to the realm of bigotry. I think the whole incident was less about your trews and more about your date's personal hang-ups.

[Burly Brute]

And take pictures.

My sentiments exactly. To be honest with you, I met my fiance on eharmony...and the way she feels about my kilts now, she would never have gone on a second date with me had I wore it on the first. Every situation is different, but ladies it seems need to be eased into these things 9/10 of the time. However, her intense brashness seems a bit over the top and sounds as if you dodged a real bullet. God bless man!

slainte,

Zach

[NewEnglander]

In a bit of coincidence, one of my 2nd graders just walked into class wearing tartan pants! (i don't want to ruffle feathers by calling them trews if they didn't have the correct blah blah blah)
I loudly complimented his fashion choice and one of the other students said that her father has a pair of pants like that which he wears to fancy dinners!

[Scott West]

Geez man, sorry to hear about the (disproportionately harsh) negative reaction. Although it is a loss of a prospect, I agree with the Rabble that perhaps it's better to learn of her rigidity now vs. later. Doesn't take the sting away though. Again, sorry.

About a year ago, I lost what I expected to be a future, solid friendship. My wife & I met a newly-befriended married couple at a local pub (Culhane's Irish Pub) for a few pints and to listen to the Jacksonville Pipes & Drums. After seeing my kilt, they visibly didn't know how to react or behave. They haven't talked to us since. Our reaction/My opinion: Very sorry they felt that way, however, oh well. I was dressed appropriately (indeed, dressed very well, IMHO), and nowadays I'm DONE worrying about acceptability, opinions or people's eagerness to be offended.

Best of luck in the Future!

[Mikilt]

The fact that she used the term "gay" as a perjoritive notwithstanding...

She was just plain rude. Without even getting to know you, she judged you based on something unfamiliar to her.

This was harsh. I am sorry that you had to endure it.

[LANCER1562]

Some eharmony meet ups are success stories. Some are total failures. I have had three of those failures. As soon as she found out that I wear a kilt, she decided that she "could not date a guy who wears skirts".

[RockyR]

I agree with Cessna... wear the kilt on the first date. If you wear it "appropriate for the setting" (argyll and vest if it's a fancy resteraunt VS. tshirt and boots to a rock concert), it'll be a trial by fire type thing. I'd also TELL her in advance you'll be wearing it. If she says "Really, that's so cool", you know you've got a chance at a relationship. If she says "Absolutely NOT", then you know to probe a bit and be on gaurd it probably won't work out. If she sounds pensive, but open, be gaurded, but give her the opportunity.

If a woman (or ANYONE for that matter) doesn't like you for who you are, then why should you enter into a relationship where they're bound to try to change you and cause friction? It's MUCH easier to sidestep the entire relationship when you know the reaction from the beginning.

*** as an afterthought... maybe a "Celtic Festival" or an authentic Irish Pub could be your first date... may ease the tensions a bit to see others in kilts. FWIW

*** 2nd afterthought... is there anywhere on your profile to make a note that you're interested in Celtic Culture and wearing kilts? That may thin the herd before they ever contact you and save you the trouble.

[BroosterB1]

Take a page from RiverKilt, wear the kilt, post pictures of you wearing the kilt on E Harmony and other sites. The ones who are attracted to you wearing the kilt may not have as much of a reaction to the trews. if you really like wearing the kilt and were wearing trews instead, maybe you we not being as authentic as you could have been.

I found my wife over twenty years ago, so the modern dating scene is not something I have a lot of experience with; but I would not shirk from what I have decided as the way I want to dress. Be it jeans, kilts or a Brooks Brothers suit some one who judges you because of what you wear and not who you are is not someone I would want to spend a lot of time with. ith:

[Alan H]

Couple of things....

1. While I don't like it one little bit, the term "gay" is used, especially among some young people, as a synonym for "bad" or "stupid" these days. She might not have necessarily meant to say that you looked like a homosexual man.....which of course just brings up the ridiculous question of "what does a homosexual man look like?" ...and that is QUITE enough on that topic.

2. As has been pointed out, here on X-Marks we are just ga-ga over anything tartan. If it's plaid, we love it. The rest of the world doesn't share that viewpoint. I'm not surprised in the slightest that she reacted strongly to your trews. Kilts are cool. Plaid pants are stupid....so goes the view of the majority of the world.

3. For some reason which is totally beyond me, there's a fashion trend with some young people now to wear pajama bottoms as pants, "out and about". Hey, I didn't make up this trend, I just have observed it. It's to the point where there are now "pajama bottom" flannel pants...usually plaid of some kind.... with elastic waistbands being sold in the clothing department. It's likely that's what the young man was wearing when he showed up to school in "trews".

[Tobus]

3. For some reason which is totally beyond me, there's a fashion trend with some young people now to wear pajama bottoms as pants, "out and about". Hey, I didn't make up this trend, I just have observed it. It's to the point where there are now "pajama bottom" flannel pants...usually plaid of some kind.... with elastic waistbands being sold in the clothing department. It's likely that's what the young man was wearing when he showed up to school in "trews".

I saw that for the first time a few days ago! I was at an upscale furniture store, of all places, looking for a new leather sofa, and I saw a young man (probably in his early 20s) wearing what appeared to be trews or tartan trousers. I started to approach him and pay him a compliment, until I noticed they were plaid flannel pajama bottoms. I couldn't believe he actually wore them out in public, but at least now I understand why.