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30th August 16, 05:28 AM
#261
The sad marionettist cried a puppeteer
 Originally Posted by Alan H
Some days you're the bat, some days you're the watermelon.
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30th August 16, 07:38 AM
#262
 Originally Posted by Flatlander Bob
A Higgs Bosson goes into a church. The Rev. says,
You have to leave now we are going to have service.
I cant leave without me there is no mass! 
A pun, in context, full of pew.
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30th August 16, 01:34 PM
#263
 Originally Posted by Tarheel
A pun, in context, full of pew.
pew pew by michael_malone22, on Flickr
 Originally Posted by Alan H
Some days you're the bat, some days you're the watermelon.
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30th August 16, 02:29 PM
#264
Through gardening magazines she leafed
When he pulled down his pants he was debriefed
A tauntaun is about Luke warm
The Persian girl had a nice cuneiform
When my phone runs out battery it’s a damned cell in distress
When a girl gets married, she gets a new name and a dress
One tree to another, “Leaf me alone”
On about bagpipes I could drone
 Originally Posted by Alan H
Some days you're the bat, some days you're the watermelon.
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2nd September 16, 10:32 AM
#265
My dog won't drink plain tap water.
He's a Scottish Perrier.
 Originally Posted by Alan H
Some days you're the bat, some days you're the watermelon.
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3rd September 16, 05:32 PM
#266
With her blue ribbon pumpkin she said, “Oh my gourd!”
The carpenter was perpetually board
I’m partial to fractions if the topic is math
Crazy people take the psychopath
At the Cliffs of Dover, chalk is steep
I bought some chickens for really cheep
Your nose is the scenter of your face
He counted uno, dos, and disappeared without a tres
An over the top soiree was feted
The rhythmic dishwashers were sinkopated
My vegetable pot sprung a leek
Seven day with no pun makes one weak
Holding your horses is a tale of whoa
The bison population hit a new buffa-low
Spilled Spot remover on my dog
My xmas diary is a yule log
The wine taster had a blanc stare
My fruit’s pared down to a pair of pears
I wholeheartedly love artichokes
The poor composer was baroque
 Originally Posted by Alan H
Some days you're the bat, some days you're the watermelon.
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6th September 16, 03:25 PM
#267
The vegan fortune teller read my taro
 Originally Posted by Alan H
Some days you're the bat, some days you're the watermelon.
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7th September 16, 08:52 AM
#268
I bought bread for a pumpernickel
Labyrinths are amazing
 Originally Posted by Alan H
Some days you're the bat, some days you're the watermelon.
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7th September 16, 06:49 PM
#269
Speechless...you, sir, are genius. These are golden!
"We are all connected...to each other, biologically; to the earth, chemically; to the universe, atomically...and that makes me smile." - Neil deGrasse Tyson
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8th September 16, 07:30 PM
#270
I cannot berry my love of tiny fruit.
 Originally Posted by Alan H
Some days you're the bat, some days you're the watermelon.
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