Heart to Heart with my wife

**Kilted KT** · 4th January 07, 03:36 PM

Mrs. C,
Welcome to the forum! As you can see, a great many of us have this same type of discussion with out significant others. I am working on the very same issues with my wife, and she has many of the same concerns as you do. I applaud your willingness to explore and understand the kilt, it's meaning and why on earth you husband would want to strap such a thing on!

welcome!

**Rigged** · 4th January 07, 05:08 PM

I've been wearing kilts for around 7 years on an almost daily basis. I bought the first one, and my wife bought the next 3. I'm up to 11 kilts now and I rarely wear trousers except when I'm on duty at work, where, as an emergency responder, I have to wear a uniform. When I'm off-duty, I wear kilts to the office.

I have a smidgen of Scottish heritage, but I wear kilts for the comfort and practicality they provide -- as well as the variety of styles and options available. Whether I'm wearing a casual "cargo" or "worker's" kilt or a more traditional tartan kilt, I get mainly positive comments if any.

I'm old enough to remember when women couldn't wear pants in public without raising a few eyebrows. It wasn't until the late 1970s that women could wear pants to work. A lot of women wanted to wear pants in public, but were afraid of social ostracism, so they wore them around the house until the day came when it was OK for women to wear them.

Eventually, clothing makers began making pants specifically for women. Now, it's so commonplace to see women in pants, that I rarely see a woman wearing a skirt or dress anymore.

Kilts have always been men's clothing. More and more of us guys are finding out how comfortable, practical, versatile, and durable they are. A lot of us are still afraid to wear them in public. Hopefully that will change in the not-too-distant future. Meanwhile, those of us on the leading edge of this growing trend need the support of our friends and families.

**michael steinrok** · 4th January 07, 07:37 PM

Originally Posted by mddock58

Mrs. Cavscout,

I'm glad you love him enough to try to understand his differences, and are willing to allow the change, however gradual, within yourself.

Good luck! Thanks for letting us hear it from your perspective, that helps all of us as well.

I second that and will add I got my first kilt when I was about 39. I alway thought they were cool but expensive. That is what took me so long. I learned about kilts when I was a kid maybe ten years old and was told that the scots were teriffic fighters. Scared the Germans half to death sometimes.
Lots of women don't see those movies or read that kind of history so your feelings are somewhat understandable. At least you are trying Mr C is lucky to have a loving wife. I am lucky that the woman I am with not only likes the kilt(She saw a picture of me on line) she has also bought one for me

Good luck , and let us know how you do

**Warlock** · 4th January 07, 10:31 PM

It was only 100 years ago that a woman wearing pants in public would have been ostracised as a trmap or something worse. It took 30 years to get over that. I am sure no one expects you to change overnight Mrs. Cavscout. Just keep an open mind and heart, and nothing else will matter.

**cavscout** · 5th January 07, 08:50 AM

Thank you gentlemen. I was sure I was going to get blasted for the "feminine" remark and relieved I did not. You have handled yourselves well. You have given me some things to ponder. I will see if I can get those books from the library. I do like the whole "warrior" concept.

I do take slight exception to the comparison of women wearing pants. (I had already told my husband that was coming.) I agree that on principle it is the same. And I also agree that there are many double standards where men and women are concern. Where I take exception is on the emotional perception of it. (I can't think of a better word.) Because my husband and I both grew up with women wearing pants and shorts when I wear them there is no masculine connotation. At least to us. Also, I dress the same as when my husband met me. So my wearing pants is of no surprise.

Thanks Guys,
Mrs Cavscout

**Dreadbelly** · 5th January 07, 08:54 AM

Originally Posted by cavscout

Thank you gentlemen. I was sure I was going to get blasted for the "feminine" remark and relieved I did not. You have handled yourselves well. You have given me some things to ponder. I will see if I can get those books from the library. I do like the whole "warrior" concept.

I do take slight exception to the comparison of women wearing pants. (I had already told my husband that was coming.) I agree that on principle it is the same. And I also agree that there are many double standards where men and women are concern. Where I take exception is on the emotional perception of it. (I can't think of a better word.) Because my husband and I both grew up with women wearing pants and shorts when I wear them there is no masculine connotation. At least to us. Also, I dress the same as when my husband met me. So my wearing pants is of no surprise.

Thanks Guys,
Mrs Cavscout

Mrs Cavscout, if more women were like you, the world would be a much nicer place.

Enjoy the journey.

**Splash_4** · 5th January 07, 09:09 AM

Hear, Hear. And if you are unable to find the books in the library, I am rather close and have them readily available. If you and your spouse are coming to the Burns supper in Conyers, I will have them in the truck with me.

**Joe Gondek** · 5th January 07, 10:19 AM

I do take slight exception to the comparison of women wearing pants. (I had already told my husband that was coming.) I agree that on principle it is the same. And I also agree that there are many double standards where men and women are concern. Where I take exception is on the emotional perception of it. (I can't think of a better word.) Because my husband and I both grew up with women wearing pants and shorts when I wear them there is no masculine connotation. At least to us. Also, I dress the same as when my husband met me. So my wearing pants is of no surprise.

Thanks Guys,
Mrs Cavscout

I do ot know how old you are but if you grew up when women were always wearing pants than you're younger than my 56 years.

My Mother was born in 1911
She was left an orphan after the Spanish Flu epidemic of 1918
She had always worked outside the home when it wasn't common for a woman to do so
Divorced, which was a big NO-NO in the 1940's & 50's, she raisied 5 children without a husband

I bring this up these points to show that she was a strong person

But I remember in my junior year of High School How nervous and frighten she was when she wore a womans pants suit to work for the first time in her life at the age of 57. And this was in our nations capitol, not so small red neck town.

There used to be a very strong emotional perception and masculine connotation to women wearing pants everyday in public. Pants wearind for women was restricted to recreation and sports

This is the same type of stima that kilt wearers face today.Its sad that it comes from our wives,Mine included at times.

If it were not for strong willed ,free thinking woman in the past; Women would be forced by society to wearing a dress everyday

**cessna152towser** · 5th January 07, 10:40 AM

My wife wore skirts full time when we married twenty odd years ago but nowadays she wears trousers full time. She first tried trousers in keeping with the trend in ladies fashions and found them more comfortable for her. She introduced me to kilts through her interest in Scottish Country Dancing and I finally plucked up the courage to get my first kilt after we were about five years married. It took a leg injury four years ago which kept me out of trousers to get me into first starting wearing kilts as everyday wear. Now I wear kilts almost every day and own twice as many kilts as trousers.

**Big Mikey** · 5th January 07, 11:14 AM

Mrs. Cavscout,

I would like to thank you for having the courage to at least try to understand your husbands desire to connect with his heritage. My wife and I have been married 22 years now. I have never been an excessive drinker, abuser, philanderer or any other type of person that would endanger our commitment to each other. She is quite willing to accept the fact that I spend my money on kilts and not something wasteful. She encouraged me to purchase my first kilt and now supports my addiction, though sometimes begrudgingly. The only downside, according to her, is trying to get me off the computer to do my share of the housework!! Good luck on your journey.