No kilt at the wedding, or some people still don't get it

**mcvarmit** · 2nd April 07, 07:10 AM

mr. aarogcow,
you didn't get slammed, you just got honest responses. in a day and age when people will tell you anything, its refreshing when someone actuall tells you the truth. just my 2 cents.

semper fi

slick

**auld argonian** · 2nd April 07, 07:16 AM

Gee...I have a relative with three children who are reaching marriageable age and I really would prefer it if I wasn't even invited to those weddings.

Thus, I told my wife that she should be grateful for my having found the "kilt thing" as I was going to announce that I would henceforth and forever more be wearing the kilt to any and all special family events that I will ever attend. That ought to make them at least think twice about inviting me and probably create a "gee, I'm sorry...your invitation must have gotten lost in the mail" situation when the times come.

Boo-yeah!

Best

AA

**escherblacksmith** · 2nd April 07, 07:18 AM

I don't think people were slamming, just reinforcing what you were already saying. My guess is we have all run into this at one time or another. Especially when it seems that kilt wearers are traditionally unorthodox (oxymoron?). Conflict will always move in our wakes.

Something else to keep in mind. All weddings have some familial pressures, and depending on your relationship to your family determine how much is dictated to you. My own wedding story would have been kilted but I owned naught at the time (well, a greatkilt, but it really wasn't formal enough), and buying or renting was out of the budget at the time (this was 11 years ago).

But, knowing I had to make a statement for me, I opted for tux shorts. The wife was okay, until her family and friends got involved. Then I just had to ask, was it her wedding or theirs?

Shorts won out.

Don't fault the bride or groom too much, sometimes the battle isn't worth fighting. Being as I was already known as cantankerous to both my family and hers, it wasn't real surprising that I would be somewhat recalcitrant to their interference.

So, I applaud your choice and also agree with a previous poster. Ask during your toast how the heck you get these silly pants off!

**Canadian_Kilt** · 2nd April 07, 11:28 AM

My response was more directed at some of the replies than you. I didn't get the impression from your OP that you had any intention of wearing anything but what they wanted.

But, I still maintain that wedding party wears what they're told - and for the entire duration of the wedding. Wanting to change into something else at the reception is not acceptable unless you first seek permission, and ESPECIALLY not as a 'surprise'. Brides hate surprises. Photographs go on all night - they chose the outfits to give the wedding a look they enjoyed, and that should be maintained at the dinner and dance.

If you're not in the wedding party, that's a different story. However I do think it is still polite to check with the couple before wearing a kilt to their wedding. Some may have concern that you will draw attention away from them. While you may not agree, this is the one day in their lives where they get to be right, and if they don't want you to wear it, you don't, or you don't go.

**Caradoc** · 2nd April 07, 02:33 PM

Originally Posted by Canadian_Kilt

However I do think it is still polite to check with the couple before wearing a kilt to their wedding. Some may have concern that you will draw attention away from them. While you may not agree, this is the one day in their lives where they get to be right, and if they don't want you to wear it, you don't, or you don't go.

I did not wear a kilt to a wedding yesterday - I was there as the photographer, not as a participant per se. I didn't even ask the couple if I could wear a kilt.

I therefore wore my "nice" black pants, dark green shirt, and tried to make myself as unobtrusive as possible.

However... I'm pretty sure that even in a kilt, I couldn't possibly have drawn any attention away from them.

**Canadian_Kilt** · 3rd April 07, 11:33 AM

Originally Posted by Caradoc

I did not wear a kilt to a wedding yesterday - I was there as the photographer, not as a participant per se. I didn't even ask the couple if I could wear a kilt.

I therefore wore my "nice" black pants, dark green shirt, and tried to make myself as unobtrusive as possible.

However... I'm pretty sure that even in a kilt, I couldn't possibly have drawn any attention away from them.

LOL