Other questions

[majdan]

I've had the inverse; "Aren't you cold?" from a fellow shivering in blue jeans and a cotton sweatshirt. "Are you kidding? I'm wearing enough wool to knit a sheep". With my thick hose, kilt, heavy Hebrides sweater, and woolen bonnet, I was perfectly comfortable, and considerably warmer than he was.

I must be an exception; I don't find most questions irritating, and enjoy the opportunity they offer.

I agree intirely. I also think that, "I hoped the other women upstairs are better looking" is dead witty. Just because a joke is at your expense does not make it any less witty. I would have just replied that there would be no more drinks for that one.

[ChromeScholar]

"Are you kidding? I'm wearing enough wool to knit a sheep".

[davedove]

Probably the most common is "Are you Scottish?" No, I'm American with a little Scottish blood.

I also get "Is there something going on today?" I don't know, did I miss something?

"Do you play the bagpipes?" No, do you?

"Why are you wearing a kilt?" Because I feel like it.

[Rigged]

I'm often asked, "Where are you from?" to which I usually reply, "Pittsburgh", which is my home town. I love seeing the confused look on people's faces.

Sometimes people ask, "Is that a kilt?" It's too bad I'm not on commission when people ask that one. I'm sure I've sold quite a few kilts after being asked that.

I've gotten the "So, where are your bagpipes?" question a few times - always from a woman. I just stand there grinning until she "gets it" and turns red with embarassment.

[McG]

If a git asked here, it would be - " Why ye wearing the kilt the day"

"BECAUSE I CAN" !!

Never had a bad reply.

[Ozman1944]

I was at my regular printers during the CA heatwave. 110o ; a fellow customer said, as I was leaving; "I bet this is hotter than Scotland"; I said "I wouldn't have a clue - I'm Australian". The printer roared with laughter at the confused look on this guys face as I left. I heard him say; 'Lots of guys wear kilts these days, catch up man!'

[Robinhood]

When people ask if I play the pipes, I usually reply:

"That depends on who's listening."

or:

"I call it playing."

[auld argonian]

One that comes up now and again...usually after the initial shock of seeing a guy in a kilt subsides:

"How do you go to the bathroom in that thing?"

...now, I didn't say it was an INTELLIGENT question...I just said it was a question.

Best

AA

ps: I've discovered a great answer to "The Question", by the way: no matter what you are or are not wearing underneath, just very casually say "Just matching gym shorts...no big deal." This is SUCH a disappointing answer that the "witty" questioner just lets it drop.

[PiobBear]

"Do you play the pipes?"
One particularly thick person got the reply, "No, do you play the banjo?" but they didn't get it.

I've just got to file that one away for future use!