Whatever has happened to manners

[Alan H]

Everything was so much better, back then.....

[Alan H]

Did you all know that there's a really interesting FaceBook group, now? It's called "Strong is the new Skinny" and it's for women. You know...strong women who are in shape and work out and are entirely capable of opening their own doors, or standing up in a bus.

Did you know that Annie Thorisdottir is a member of this group?



Did you know that the current United States Secretary of State is a woman? Seriously, no kidding!

Did you know that both the Senators from the State of California are women? Honest! Would I lie to you?

Did you know that I was fired from my previous job by my bosses boss, who was a woman? No kiddin'..Yup.

It's amazing that women can do such things, frail little delicate creatures that they are.

***remove tongue from cheek***

Personally, I figure the greater mark of respect is to treat a woman like the intelligent, competent, strong, capable person that she is, and save giving up seats on the bus to people who really need them, irregardless of gender. Respect -> manners, but the specifics of the chemical makeup of the necessary social grease change with the person and with the society. It's still necessary, just take care in applying your own formula, and assuming your *yours* is the only formula that works or is appropriate, especially as you/we/I get older.

[Alan H]

Lyle1.

I quite understand your sister-in-law's predicament, but I would like to think that a gentleman would offer his seat nonetheless and there is nothing to say that the offer HAS to be accepted-----and if the lady so wishes, the kind gesture is declined, graciously.

And THAT, my friend Jock Scot, is precisely why you are a charming OLD MAN. You sport the values and manners of your generation, as do I. There's nothing wrong with that until you start demanding that everybody hew to your ways, and bellowing about how anybody who does not, is crass and disgusting.

Were the young woman I described above standing in the bus and were you to offer her your seat, she would probably look at you funny and say No thanks, I'm fine, and continue on with reading her online/downloaded book about powerlifting/how to succeed in business/programming in Perl or whatever it was that she was doing. She would think you a lovely old Scoittish gentleman with your outmoded ways and tweed jacket, and she is not in the tiniest bit offended by the young lad who is sitting immediately next to her in the seat, wearing his Anaheim Ducks knit cap and his thrash metal t-shirt, with his ears stuffed up with the earbuds from his ipod.

YOU would be horrified. She is not.

Relax.

[Jock Scot]

And THAT, my friend Jock Scot, is precisely why you are a charming OLD MAN.

Relax.

I say, steady on!

I KNOW I am an OLD MAN! But there is no need to labour the point!

[Alan H]

I say, steady on!

I KNOW I am an OLD MAN! But there is no need to labour the point!

I am working hard on this old man thing. I bet I'll get it right in another ten years or so....

[Jock Scot]

I am working hard on this old man thing. I bet I'll get it right in another ten years or so....

This age thing was brought home to me when my 16 year old step daughter-----bless her------thought that our 30 year old postman was old. She must think that I am Methuselah's elder brother!

I think it is quite understandable that each generation finds it own set of standards of behaviour, in spite of my parents dire predictions my generation did, my sons' generation has, and there is no doubt that my step children are doing so, but in the end I do think that most of them---not all by any means----end up being fairly civil to others, eventually!

[creagdhubh]

I say, steady on!

I KNOW I am an OLD MAN! But there is no need to labour the point!

Hahaha!!!

[creagdhubh]

Lyle1.

I quite understand your sister-in-law's predicament, but I would like to think that a gentleman would offer his seat nonetheless and there is nothing to say that the offer HAS to be accepted-----and if the lady so wishes, the kind gesture is declined, graciously.

Precisely. I couldn't have said it better, Jock.

[KiltedKnome]

For the Robert Heinlein fans, there is the quote from the notebooks of Lazarus Long:

Moving parts in rubbing contact require lubrication to avoid excessive wear. Honorifics and formal politeness provide lubrication where people rub together. Often the very young, the untraveled, the naive, the unsophisticated deplore these formalities as “empty,” “meaningless,” or “dishonest,” and scorn to use them. No matter how “pure” their motives, they thereby throw sand into machinery that does not work too well at best."

My father always taught me that courtesy, politeness and respect in society is always something to be embraced -- and it is goes both ways. If you want to be treated with respect, you need to give respect.

[LANCER1562]

Common courtesy and common sense; two things that, sadly, are not as common as they used to be. The current generation learns from the generation before it, which in turn learned from the previous generation however, from what I've seen of the current generation, those teachings seem to have skipped a generation.