feeling special is not OK

[auld argonian]

I have to say that I've seen some positively DREADFUL "formalwear" worn by bridal parties - specifically on the groom. Bear in mind that I lived through the seventies...and as one reporter whose column that I read in a Minnesota newspaper said about the recent revival of "that Seventies look", "...kids, we thought that we wore those awful clothes so that our children wouldn't have to."

The formal kilted look is pretty damn good in my estimation...face it...it beats getting hitched dressed as Elvis or something like that...perhaps a Klingon theme would make your future MOL happier?

We got married twice...once in a small civil ceremony with a couple of good friends present and once in the whole full blown church thingy (but I wore a tasteful navy blue Valentino suit...not a tux...I wanted to look like myself and not somebody's butler).

It's good that you and your intended are on the same page about this...

best

auld argonian

[Alan H]

Just to put my kilt-wearing in perspective in terms of going "out there" and edgy as part of a midlife crisis, let's do a little review of The Edge" since I turned 38....

In 1996 I was 38 years old. I had an affair with a woman I met on the internet and I sailed my 29-foot sailboat, solo from California to Hawaii. I ended the affair a month before I left the dock and got back together with my wife. Smartest thing I ever did was hook back up with her, and the affair was the STUPIDEST thing I have ever done..

Last year, summer of 2004 I didn't have an affair, and took a shot at racing my current boat, solo to Hawaii. A little 40-knot gale with 18 foot seas off the coast got in the way and I had the adventure of a lifetime trying to sail the 200 miles BACK to California through all that. Not to mention the Sailing Trip from Hell coming 250 miles up the Coast in a damaged boat with no electrical system to get back to San Francisco.

So this kilt thing is small potatoes. If I'm going to do something edgy as part of my mid-life crisis, I'm not going to muck around with some panty-waist little thing like strapping on a kilt. Hell no, I'm going to cut loose and do my midlife crisis, RIGHT.

BTW, summer 2008, I head for Hawaii again, solo. After that, maybe solo to Australia, we'll see.

[KiltedCodeWarrior]

Ah, well, I knew I was right. All kidding aside tho', I knew she'd be really hacked off after I read that you had walked away without saying a word. She would only interpret that in a negative way. (No you don't get the benefit of the doubt on that one!)

I'm glad you are working it out together. Working it out as partners, as opposed to some power struggle, will pay big dividends for your marriage & your family.

Sherry
Married 25 years to the same, fine man--no, really!

Sherry, that just proves that women and men view the world differently. I think that if the same incident occurred between two men, neither would have taken offense and been meeting for a drink after work.

We do try to work it out, because my wife's parents have a very traditional relationship based on the woman stays home and tends to the family while the husband works, and they stay together no matter what. On my side, the divorces and re-marriages require a play book as some of the players show up in multiple marriages, and I don't mean the ones I am related to! This gives us both unique perspectives. I don't want to follow my family's path and my wife is unwilling to settle for what her Mom had in a marriage. I think it makes us both really committed to making it work, but open to changes in our relationship and also willing to evaluate where we are on a regular basis.

The fact that we will have been together for 20 years this December, 17 married is a good sign. There have been many times, especiallt before we got kids 3 years ago and more so since then, that we could have called it quits.

[KiltedCodeWarrior]

Just to put my kilt-wearing in perspective in terms of going "out there" and edgy as part of a midlife crisis, let's do a little review of The Edge" since I turned 38....

In 1996 I was 38 years old. I had an affair with a woman I met on the internet and I sailed my 29-foot sailboat, solo from California to Hawaii. I ended the affair a month before I left the dock and got back together with my wife. Smartest thing I ever did was hook back up with her, and the affair was the STUPIDEST thing I have ever done..

Last year, summer of 2004 I didn't have an affair, and took a shot at racing my current boat, solo to Hawaii. A little 40-knot gale with 18 foot seas off the coast got in the way and I had the adventure of a lifetime trying to sail the 200 miles BACK to California through all that. Not to mention the Sailing Trip from Hell coming 250 miles up the Coast in a damaged boat with no electrical system to get back to San Francisco.

So this kilt thing is small potatoes. If I'm going to do something edgy as part of my mid-life crisis, I'm not going to muck around with some panty-waist little thing like strapping on a kilt. Hell no, I'm going to cut loose and do my midlife crisis, RIGHT.

BTW, summer 2008, I head for Hawaii again, solo. After that, maybe solo to Australia, we'll see.

Alan, I have to agree, live life to excess, moderation is for monks! check out Iolaus sig, as that sums it up for me. Making it into a coffin as the best dressed and most well preserved corpse has absolutely no attraction for me.

On another note, I love to sail, if you ever need a hand, or another kilted guy to stand by, let me know.