Ok, I'm just gonna ask....

[Tony]

Margaret Thatcher always does the trick for me.
Your results may vary.

[wildrover]

Echoing what Steve said...wear it around the house, in the garage, to the gas station, then to the hardware store...expand your kilt-wearing experience gradually. You'll find you get used to it pretty quick (and honestly, this is nothing of a problem compared to the consternation you may feel the first time you need to torque a moonfish while kilted).

The sporran helps. This might be a perfect excuse to get a horsehair sporran with a trick metal cantle, in case you don't have a pretty girl handy to camouflage the condition .

-Sean

[slohairt]

Yes, the sporran; if not, then close your eyes and think about England.....

That doesn't work for me. I like English women!

[KiltedCodeWarrior]

Hilarious thread. Great for a morning read.

In regards to the actual question (not THE question of course), the sporran has always done the job for me. And when I am wearing a non-trad, I find that the aprons usually are enough, especially with the snaps on the front of a UK to contain the beast!

[McFarkus]

I echo the need for a well-stocked sporran.

Prick yourself with the kilt pin. Your problem should go away.

So, THAT'S what kilt pins are for!

Edit: Hey! I just became a Kilted Samurai! HYAH!!!! *dork* lol

If you have no life (like some of us) you will progress swiftly in the ranks.

I have to use a very very very large sporran

You might also try a military cut kilt - it adds an extra 4" (LOL). If you need a significantly larger than normal sporran, Turpin has been known to make them to size.

[dtandthekilt]

I have found that the sporan takes the place of folding your hands and putting them between your legs somewhat while sitting down to push the kilt down enough so that the public can't say you are sitting in an indecent position. After a while you may find that you don't even think about it because you will be used to wearing the kilt. If I were in a nudist camp the first few days would be challenging. After that it would be the "same old thing". The first time I wore my kilt was challeging also. Hope this helps.

[piperdbh]

If I were in a nudist camp the first few days would be challenging.

Wouldn't wearing a kilt in a nudist camp break some of the rules?

There's a hole in the fence at the local nudist colony. Police are looking into it.

[Bigkahuna]

"Torque a Moonfish"????????????

[Riverkilt]

Have often worn a kilt at nudist resorts - upon arrival and at mealtime in the restaurants, and when leaving the grounds.

The question for this situation is if a nudist man and a nudist lady are talking and "it happens" to the man is it a compliment or an insult?

[D.A. Guertin]

One of the many problems with being a man is that it does, in fact, 'happen.' Regardless of our acceptance of, emm, 'Asadachi,' it happens whether we want it to or not, and it really doesn't matter what the context is. I've had the issue at any point in any day under any context. I've never been overly concerned of it kilted, as I've always simply extended the conversation until the issue passed, which generally happened as naturally as the 'issue' itself, but I have faith in my sporran as well. ;-)