Wore trews on first date

[Teufel Hunden]

I can't say I've met a woman who likes trews, to be honest.

Basically all the women I know very well LOVE kilts. Hell, even my brother's lady friends, when they heard I was having a kilted wedding this year, several of them immediately requested to be his date. It's quite a thing.

But these same women, especially my fiancee and my close kilted friends' wives, all have a SERIOUS distaste for trews. I'm actually not a fan of them myself, but all of the ladies in question likened them to pajama pants. Mind you, these are ladies fairly familiar with highland wear, tartans, the history involved, etc. My fiancee actually requested that I don't wear them unless the event we're attending calls specifically for them for some reason.

That all being said, I'm with everyone else who said you'd like to find these things out right away. In fact, I'd say she did you a favor by being so open about her poor qualities, rather than hiding them and leading you on for weeks or months. As insulting as it was, I'd walk away glad I didn't invest much time in her aside from the phone calls. Don't think too much on her... it's mathematically impossible to not meet another woman.

[acolander]

Hootstwo,

Whilst I commend you on your approach to professional attire, there are a couple of things you mention that stood out and begged reply.

I try to envision what some of my good friends would think if I were to wear trews to a function and almost across the board they'd think not well of me - despite the fact that most of them LOVE my kilts. I don't really know why it is, an exposure thing I suppose. MOST people have seen kilts - be it in person, on TV or at a parade and generally they think highly of folks that they've seen in them. Trews on the other hand, well they're not exactly something most folks have seen.

If they really would not think well of you for simply wearing trews, are they really that good of friends? If they are embarrassed to be seen w/ you whilst wearing trews perhaps then they are simply more akin to acquaintances..?

Be that as it may.. Sure, some of my mates pay me out occasionally, something along the lines of me not shouting across a room to get a woman's attnetion so why my trousers, but it is really no different than a kilt in that regard.

Speaking of kilt vs trews, I'll wager that most people are still accustomed to seeing men wearing trousers, or should we say truibhas, or trews.. Whether they are plaid or striped, plain or tartan is of really no consequence as trousers are still predominantly what men wear most the world over, and if one happened to live through the '70's at a fashion conscience age or currently play on the links then I'm more certain tartan trousers are not any nearer the realm of obscurity than a kilt in this isntance.

On a first date, I'd expect most people would want to impress the person they're going to meet, not necessarily demonstrate the "individuality" or "quirkiness" that hopefully their date will GROW to cherish.

Quite frankly, I believe a kilt (especially a "contemporary" one) more readily demonstrates this "individuality" and "quirkiness" far more than tartan trousers, or trews, unless one meets their first date after pipe band practice or event... One is still a bifurcated garment, the other in essence, a pleated skirt.

Some of you will say that you don't want any part of those people and they're not worth your time. Well, I guess I'd say that's too bad because many of them can be great and fun people, they just need some time to acclimate. It's sort of like when I tried sushi for the first time, definitely not my thing, but now that I've had more exposure and grown accustomed to it, it's one of my absolute favorite foods.

Well honestly, I would be more inclined to say they are not worth my time considering that is what they would be saying to me, which is too bad for them really as I have a failry large eclectic group of friends and I'm certain they would have quite enjoyed the good craic - I certainly do!

As to sushi, I've tried it several times in numerous places (even Japan) and unless its Unagi Maki - No thanks!! ;)

[Tobus]

acolander, I know your comments were in response to Hootstwo, but I'd like to chime in, if I may.

Speaking of kilt vs trews, I'll wager that most people are still accustomed to seeing men wearing trousers, or should we say truibhas, or trews.. Whether they are plaid or striped, plain or tartan is of really no consequence as trousers are still predominantly what men wear most the world over, and if one happened to live through the '70's at a fashion conscience age or currently play on the links then I'm more certain tartan trousers are not any nearer the realm of obscurity than a kilt in this isntance.

But... that's the whole point. It's not that people don't know what tartan trousers are, or that they've never seen them before. The problem is that they HAVE seen them before, and they're reminded of awful '70s fashion trends that have been relegated to the stuff of jokes and parodies and clown outfits. At least with a kilt, people can put it in the context of being traditional Scottish attire. But tartan trousers simply aren't as well-accepted as plain or pin-striped trousers.

I know you're proud of your trews, and good on ya for it. But with all due respect, I think you may be underestimating the general (American) public's attitude of derision regarding anything which remotely resembles "plaid pants". As an exercise in curiosity, I did an informal poll with some of my coworkers on the subject, and every single one of them, male and female alike, told me that they would laugh at me if I wore tartan trousers. Like it or not, this is how the vast majority of the public feels about them. We can, and should, lament this bias against tartan trousers as a culturally significant garment, but it would be folly to ignore it completely.

If they really would not think well of you for simply wearing trews, are they really that good of friends? If they are embarrassed to be seen w/ you whilst wearing trews perhaps then they are simply more akin to acquaintances..?

I don't think this is fair. Just because someone is a friend doesn't mean they must necessarily be willing to be embarrassed in public for no reason. If, for example, one of my friends decided he wanted to wear a Bozo the Clown wig in public, would I be a lesser friend for not encouraging it? (Note: I don't mean to imply that the wearing of trews is akin to wearing a Bozo wig, but I chose that for the sake of example. A bit of reductio ad absurdum to make a point.) I might still take a bullet for a friend even if I don't want to go to the mall with him while he's wearing his wig.

We live in a society with fairly established fashion protocols. People break them all the time, either on purpose or without meaning to, and it is unrealistic to expect such a deviation to go without comment, even amongst friends, and especially amongst someone we've just met and are trying to impress. We kilt-wearers know that well enough! For many, acceptance of the kilt amongst friends and family takes time. It's not always instantaneous, and the same idea holds true with tartan trousers, even if they are already in the familiar shape and fit of regular trousers.

It would be nice if society weren't so judgmental about abnormal clothing choices, and in many ways we are moving in the direction of tolerance; but sadly, some clothing choices carry a certain social stigma due to failed fashion trends or association with ridiculous costumes. And tartan trousers are one of them. I'm glad you don't have that issue in the circles in which you run, but I think most other people would agree that wearing tartan trousers to meet someone for the first time is asking a little much in the way of 'instant acceptance'.

[St. Amish]

I haven't read every post in this thread, but there does seem to be a common sentiment. Those dating websites are designed to get people past the external shallowness of physical appearance and make people connect on a deeper intellectual and emotional level. Unfortunately, interest is piqued when the physical appearance matches up with someone's concept of who you are on an intellectual and emotional level.

I agree that future issues could be avoided when meeting a prospective romantic interest if the images they see of you on your profile match what you are normally accustomed to wearing. Some ladies will turn up their noses at your fashion sense. Others will find it charming and sexy. You would, I'm sure, prefer the latter.

My wife's family still doesn't get why I wear a kilt whenever and wherever I can. I have explained until I'm blue in the face. They never will understand fully why I dress the way that I do. My wife, however, loves my kilts. I'll take her opinion of my clothing choices over her mother's in any argument.

In the long view, you don't want to end up being with someone who despises the way that you dress. Someone may hide it for a while, but it will cause more arguments and frustration than it's worth. Keep looking and you will find yourself a beautiful little kilted lass.

[kennethrmc]

I'll add to the chorus agreeing with what Llwd said. I wouldn't want to spend my life with someone that doesn't affirm my fashion sense and heritage. Good to find out on the first date rather than later.

[nagod]

i,for one,would like to see a picture of the actual outfit.

[llyd]

I'll add to the chorus agreeing with what Llwd said. I wouldn't want to spend my life with someone that doesn't affirm my fashion sense and heritage. Good to find out on the first date rather than later.

And a good test for color blindness!

[Mike_Oettle]

While I agree wholeheartedly with the OP that his date was shallow and rude, and concur with the view that he is well shot of her, the discussion has brought me to focus a little more on trews.
While the officers in my regiment wore trews as part of their undress blues uniform, this was not something we rankers saw much of, much less ever dreamed of wearing. For us, tartan meant the kilt and that was that.
And while I have at no time worn tartan trousers (of any kind) myself, I did once own a pair of houndstooth tweed (well, perhaps not tweed, but certainly woollen) pants in (if I recall rightly) brown and green, or brown and turquoise. They were quite fashionable at the time (early ’70s).
The principal thing I recall about those pants, though, is how quickly they wore through at the knees.
This matches exactly my later experience with denim jeans.
Now here the beauty (that is to say, practicality) of the kilt reveals itself: no knees!
I can’t wait to take delivery of my first kilt (I was talking to the kiltmaker this evening), and hopefully acquire a second and a third before too long!
Regards,
Mike

[hootstwo]

acolander, I know your comments were in response to Hootstwo, but I'd like to chime in, if I may.


But... that's the whole point. It's not that people don't know what tartan trousers are, or that they've never seen them before. The problem is that they HAVE seen them before, and they're reminded of awful '70s fashion trends that have been relegated to the stuff of jokes and parodies and clown outfits. At least with a kilt, people can put it in the context of being traditional Scottish attire. But tartan trousers simply aren't as well-accepted as plain or pin-striped trousers.

I know you're proud of your trews, and good on ya for it. But with all due respect, I think you may be underestimating the general (American) public's attitude of derision regarding anything which remotely resembles "plaid pants". As an exercise in curiosity, I did an informal poll with some of my coworkers on the subject, and every single one of them, male and female alike, told me that they would laugh at me if I wore tartan trousers. Like it or not, this is how the vast majority of the public feels about them. We can, and should, lament this bias against tartan trousers as a culturally significant garment, but it would be folly to ignore it completely.


I don't think this is fair. Just because someone is a friend doesn't mean they must necessarily be willing to be embarrassed in public for no reason. If, for example, one of my friends decided he wanted to wear a Bozo the Clown wig in public, would I be a lesser friend for not encouraging it? (Note: I don't mean to imply that the wearing of trews is akin to wearing a Bozo wig, but I chose that for the sake of example. A bit of reductio ad absurdum to make a point.) I might still take a bullet for a friend even if I don't want to go to the mall with him while he's wearing his wig.

We live in a society with fairly established fashion protocols. People break them all the time, either on purpose or without meaning to, and it is unrealistic to expect such a deviation to go without comment, even amongst friends, and especially amongst someone we've just met and are trying to impress. We kilt-wearers know that well enough! For many, acceptance of the kilt amongst friends and family takes time. It's not always instantaneous, and the same idea holds true with tartan trousers, even if they are already in the familiar shape and fit of regular trousers.

It would be nice if society weren't so judgmental about abnormal clothing choices, and in many ways we are moving in the direction of tolerance; but sadly, some clothing choices carry a certain social stigma due to failed fashion trends or association with ridiculous costumes. And tartan trousers are one of them. I'm glad you don't have that issue in the circles in which you run, but I think most other people would agree that wearing tartan trousers to meet someone for the first time is asking a little much in the way of 'instant acceptance'.

^^ What he said

[SlackerDrummer]

I have two pair of tartan pants that I bought several years ago from Land's End. I wear them to work about once every three or four weeks each in the fall and winter months (they are a heavy cotton/wool blend). They always go over well with my co-workers. Here is a picture of me in the Black Watch pair at my boss's house (that would be the Kentucky governor's mansion) for this year's staff Christmas party.



And two year's ago at the same function in the Lindsay pair.



Granted these are not trews.