To kilt in modern north american society

[Finistere]

Worn properly, a kilt looks smart. Quite honestly, it's the best looking garment I own and I wear it to church quite often, as does my son. We go to a Ukrainian Orthodox church most Sundays and an Arab one on occasion. After the first two or three times wearing it, people stopped asking questions and it stopped being an oddity.

I have to confess that I am a terrible dresser. I hate fussing with my civilian clothes, but I hate that I look sloppy. When I wear a kilt, for whatever reason, I'm more conscientious about how I look. That makes my wife happy and it makes me feel more confident.

I don't care what color or race or nationality you are, if you wear a kilt properly you will look smart. If that makes somebody else feel uncomfortable then they deserve to be uncomfortable.

Well said

[Grouse Claw]

"Any ideas on a good response? I have run out of them."

I have a neighbour whose behavior disapponts me, so I have resolved to break his stone heart by doing him good turns. You might like to approach this irritating man you have described and speak quietly to him, which I have proven does disarm anger. If he still rejects you forcefully, give up for a while, while he is in this mood. There is something else you can do, but you'll have to send me a PM.

[Roderick Powell]

When my husband bought his first kilt, I thought it was really cool. He joined the group of guys we know who proudly wear theirs at least once a year on St. Patrick's day and possibly a second time to some Scottish related event, wedding or pub crawl.

The second kilt was pretty cool too, because I liked the color and, hey, he had a choice.
14 kilts later... well, obviously somewhere in there my husband made the transition to a daily kilt wearer on his days off (he's a freight train conductor and has LOTS of days off.) When he first read this thread he asked me what helped me to be accepting to him wearing a kilt in public (Public? Shoot, he wears his kilt mowing the lawn and when we go hiking!)
I stared at him blankly and said, I don't remember not being used to it. He reminded me that at first I thought it was strange and it made me uncomfortable. Hmmm... really? I had a hard time remembering.

But the more I thought about it, I did recall felling odd being in the company of a man wearing a kilt while shopping at Costco, eating at a restaurant, taking the dogs to the dog park... yes, I do seem to remember being a touch unnerved and almost, but not quite, embarrassed. I mean really, Richard (Richrail) is not one to draw attention to himself. He is a reserved, quiet sort of man and wearing a kilt most certainly does draw attention.

We've been married for 27 years and for the first 24 of those years, not one time did anyone break stride to complement my husband on his attire nor did any woman pull me aside to whisper how handsome she thought my husband was in a kilt. These are now not uncommon occurrences so, yes, I have to admit that a kilt wearer is actually drawing attention to himself. Not on purpose and certainly not to be the center of attention (at least not my husband) but because kilts are comfortable and well, as my husband jokes, "Some men wear pants and some men need more room."

But when my husband and I were first married, he worked in banking and genuinely liked being a "sharp dressed man." He bought nice suits, loved French cuffs, enjoyed a nice selection of ties. He genuinely liked looking clean and polished and had and interest in men's fashion. When he went into warehousing and then to the railroad, there was no longer opportunity to nurture his fashion sense. Kilt wearing has given him a means to return to his love of fashion. And as a wife, I have to say that's a load better than women who can't get their man out of stained jeans and holey T-shirts.

So now I am not only used to him wearing a kilt, I barely give it much thought other than helping him figure out which tartan to wear on any given day when he can't decide. People still stop us in Costco and he often gets the nod from younger guys with a hearty "Nice kilt, man!" And women still compliment me on my dashing husband. But instead of being self conscious, I smile, say "Thank you," and think to myself, "Ya and he's all mine!!"

Aboribabe.I feel many people wish to start a conversation with a gentleman in a Kilt. It does seem to me that people find it difficult to open a conversation and this can lead to difficult or controversial meeting.
One that sticks in my mind was a young lad who said; " I like your Kilt."this was a good opening.I replied " Thank you very much Sir. " He turned smiled ,and went on his way. He could have then made any comment, as the door was open for a chat.
I worked with fishing boats, so the opening comment was the weather, which usually brought a response. Possibly an update on an uncertain forecast.
When I moved to Weymouth in Dorset, South Coast U.K. the greeting was "All right ?" What was the reply ?
I discovered the standard reply was "Hello mate. " Just the way things were on the waterfront.

With regard to the greeting of a Kilt wearer, The Greeter may have any romantic thought running through his head so if I am not in my street wise mode I do not see him coming and see him eyeballing me and reply with a smile, am not ready for his greeting.
This post is getting subjective.
Folks do not see a Kiltie every day, many think that as I am wearing a Kilt, I am not a local living here in Cornwall but am visitor from Scotland.
To close; Only sixteen percent of the population here in Cornwall are Cornish so If I go to a bus stop and ask If anyone has seen my bus I could get any sort of reply.
I find that I enjoy wearing the Kilt full time and when the weather is good, the Kilt does liven up my day.... Roderick.

[O'Callaghan]

I agree, if you can, just ignore this fellow, you wouldn't want to excite his brain cell! Alternatively, you might choose to reply with a cheery wave "Plurima dies tui domine" - it's rough Latin for "And a good day to you sir" ! Or try some other obscure language of your choice.

Pog mo thoin comes immediately to mind. Perhaps that is more intemperate than you had in mind. OTOH, I am quite limited in my Irish. In French and German I know how to be far more offensive!

[Submariner]

It does take a "Man" to put on a kilt and step out in the public domain. Hen I first started wearing a kilt, I was a wee bit self conscious about it and then I did not care. Crossing a parking lot on a navy base was interesting,as well as going to a bar. But no it takes nothing to put on my kilt a wonder around.

Tonight I am going to wear my kilt to my 45th high school reunion. We will see how that goes.

[thecompaqguy]

Regarding wifely objections to wearing a kilt......

Since when does you wife tell you what to wear? Do you tell HER what to wear? I rather doubt it.

Mrs. Alan viewed the entire kilt thing with distaste for the first few months. It didn't help matters that the very first time I emerged from my study with a kilt on, I also had on a pouffy Ren Faire shirt. However, I changed that pretty quickly. I still got "looks" and "comments".

After a couple of months of that, after a "comment" I turned around, looked her squarely in the eyes and told her, to her face that she had no right to tell me what to wear. It wasn't her decision. I didn't tell her what to wear, if other people didn't like it, it didn't reflect badly on her, it was about ME. And to be honest, I told her in so many words that if she didn't like it she could damned well shut the hell up about it and keep her snide comments and sideways looks to herself.

She didn't like that....for about an hour. It was only a couple of months later, at the San Francisco Symphony, that another concert-goer made a comment about me being a poser, and Mrs. Alan (aka the Luminous Joan) ripped the guy a new orifice. I didn't have to say a word.

I think she appreciated me telling her exactly what I thought in no uncertain terms. For a long time I put an effort into being considerate, as in if an event was sort of "Her" event, then I would either ask, or just put on pants, to accommodate her comfort level. However, the rest of the time, if I wanted to wear a kilt, I wore a kilt. Now, the whole thing is a non-issue.

It's my opinion that if your wife doesn't want you to wear a kilt, and you really want to wear a kilt but you waffle and cry and worry and fuss about it and then DON'T wear a kilt because "she won't let you"...well, then you probably shouldn't wear one.

So my question is....Is it about the "Kilt"? Or is it about power and control within your relationship? Sure, a kilt is just a garment. Big whoop whether you wear one or not. But the "control" issue is NOT "big whoop". THAT really matters. Only you know whether that's an issue, or not.

I am going to try this today (you may see a later thread about 'separation caused by kilts' if it doesn't go well) she will dig her heels in and try to get her own way and say I should wear a suit instead (perhaps I will, but it will be a kilt suit ) and may protest and refuse to travel with me, choosing the bus instead... she came from a single parent family so no doubt always got her own way, but that will have to change... I'll post the outcome later on...

[Alan H]

I am going to try this today (you may see a later thread about 'separation caused by kilts' if it doesn't go well) she will dig her heels in and try to get her own way and say I should wear a suit instead (perhaps I will, but it will be a kilt suit ) and may protest and refuse to travel with me, choosing the bus instead... she came from a single parent family so no doubt always got her own way, but that will have to change... I'll post the outcome later on...

There's a fine line between standing up for yourself and being a jerk. There's also a fine line between being considerate and being a doormat.

I would not estrange Joan over an article of clothing. However, I WOULD put our relationship on the line over the issues of control and power. Only you know whether the "issue" is "kilts"...or whether it's that she thinks she has the right to tell you what to do.

[Alan H]

Worn properly, a kilt looks smart. Quite honestly, it's the best looking garment I own and I wear it to church quite often, as does my son. We go to a Ukrainian Orthodox church most Sundays and an Arab one on occasion. After the first two or three times wearing it, people stopped asking questions and it stopped being an oddity.

I have to confess that I am a terrible dresser. I hate fussing with my civilian clothes, but I hate that I look sloppy. When I wear a kilt, for whatever reason, I'm more conscientious about how I look. That makes my wife happy and it makes me feel more confident.

I don't care what color or race or nationality you are, if you wear a kilt properly you will look smart. If that makes somebody else feel uncomfortable then they deserve to be uncomfortable.

So, I'm very different from you.

I pay no consideration as to the notion of "proper" and "kilts" except for maybe Burns Night. In fact, the word "proper" on this forum is almost as annoying to me as the phrase "personal style". I suppose that I'm terrible dresser. I wear t-shirts and blue jeans to work. Sometimes I have on a polo shirt. I wear Nike trainers to work. Sometimes I wear white socks with my blue jeans and leather rockports. I don't really give a rip if I look sloppy or if my socks, shoes, or shirt bothers someone. I'm not breaking any laws, I'm not grossly outside the "dress code" for where I work. I treat people with respect and get my job done, and done well. If that's not good enough then, **shrug**

and a kilt is just a kilt. Theyr'e cool, they're fun, I like them. Therefore, I wear them. It's that simple.

[thecompaqguy]

There's a fine line between standing up for yourself and being a jerk. There's also a fine line between being considerate and being a doormat.

I would not estrange Joan over an article of clothing. However, I WOULD put our relationship on the line over the issues of control and power. Only you know whether the "issue" is "kilts"...or whether it's that she thinks she has the right to tell you what to do.

Well, I never took the time to work out what the 'issue' is, life is too short - You'll find the black women expect they have the right to tell you or anyone for that matter what to do, even if it sounds unreasonable. However, I put up with the rolling of eyes and broke out the Clark Tartan with the grey Argyll and waistcoat

which was well received by all this afternoon at the service - so much so, I'm going to break out the navy kilt suit next time round. I just let her think she has control and just go do my own thing

[SPS tools]

I've been kilted full time since about 2009. So much so that my Dr. commented on my riding jeans last week; I'd ridden the scooter instead of driving the truck. My nickname at the cigar shop where I smoke is 'Skirt Boy', which may sound bad but when compared to other names like, Tinker Bell or Church Mouse, not terrible.

Yesterday I trotted out my new Great Kilt, Ross Modern Hunting, with an ecru raw silk shirt, dark green hose, brogues (not ghillies), and balmoral. Well received at the cigar shop, with questions about the differences from my normal wear. When out for fish & chips with a friend, a gal at the next table requested a picture. (I'm constantly getting this request, which I usually grant.)

I travel all over the US garbed in one of my UtiliKilts or sometimes a 'fancy' tartan. I save the family tartans for dress up, church, etc. I would say that 99% of the comments I get are favorable, especially from people with fashion sense. The 1% I politely ignore; they usually end up looking like the back end of an equine.

Oh, and my standard answer to The Question: "Shoes & socks" or "Sandals" as the case may be.