Clever Comebacks

[rollerboy_1979]

I'm pretty good at clever comebacks, many of which I've culled from my kilted brothers and sisters on this site. One of my favorite comebacks to the age old question is, "I'm naked under all my clothes". And when asked by a guy who happens to be with a lady, I usually say, "It's funny you should ask, because I'm usually asked by women and a few gay men". The latter usually shuts them up quickly and makes them turn beet red.

Recently, I've had a comment that has me stumped, so I'm seeking your help. I dress traditionally, ie, hose, flashes, sgian dub, etc., and a couple of people have asked, on separate occasions, "Is there a parade or something?", to which I respond, "No, I just enjoy wearing the kilt". Now, that question begs for a clever answer, but I'm coming up empty. Any ideas?

Cheers!
John

[mull]

It's a fine line between clever and antagonistic. I suppose how clever you can be is a function of how well you box.

[ronstew]

Mull, I don't know you, but already I like you.

Nothing wrong with saying, "No, I just like wearing a kilt," when asked a polite question.

Rude questions are another matter.

[rollerboy_1979]

It's a fine line between clever and antagonistic. I suppose how clever you can be is a function of how well you box.

My responses are never designed to elicit a fight. The last thing I want to do is get blood on my expensive wool kilt...... mine or his

I usually tailor my response to the situation..... if it's a senior citizen who truly thinks I might be a parade participant, I'll be polite, but when some smarta** thinks he's funny, I usually like to verbally spar with him. Someday it might lead to fisticuffs, but I'm not going to worry about it. In the two years I've been wearing the kilt, I've never even gotten close to an altercation. I've found that even drunks think it's cool, and unless you're swishing around in it, most guys give you credit for having the gonads to wear one. We usually have a couple of Marines and retired cops at our kilt nights, and no one seems to want to mess with a 6'1", 205lb guy in a skirt!

[BEEDEE]

"Is there a parade or something?"

Only if you want to follow me!"

Brian

[Riverkilt]

"Yes, a parade of common sense and FREEDOM!!"

I usually just say what you say, "No - I enjoy wearing the kilt."

Or you can say yes and toss in the dates of the next nearby Highland Games.

If you wanna really befuddle them then after they ask look at your watch and give them the time. See if they point out that's not what they said. After you can say, "Oh, I heard you wrong, sorry, today is - " and give them the day of the week.

Chances are they'll walk away...

[thatcelticband]

My fav comeback to "whats under your kilt" is "on a good day, lipstick"

[Detroitpete]

"...Parade? Yep. It ended here at the pub. They said you were buying"

[Mael Coluim]

"...Parade? Yep. It ended here at the pub. They said you were buying"

int:

[KiltedHuntsman]

My standard response to "What's under your kilt?" is, "I'm a man of few words. Give me your hand" and move toward them slightly...

That usually shuts them up.