Need to know how polite you are to people who are....curious

[Father Bill]

Yeah. It's never really happened to me. I must hang out in the wrong places. Can't wait!

[Tim B]

Here in Central Iowa, I usually get compliments. "Nice kilt" or "Like your kilt". Often the public acts like they see it all the time, which I'm sure is there version of "being polite". I rarely go without underwear, so when I'm asked, I tell them. When some one comments on my "dress" I usually reply with a bit of sarcasm, telling them that a "dress" is a garment that goes from the shoulders to the hem. I correct them by telling them that technically it is a kilt, but the garment style would be a skirt. If they call it a skirt, I revert to my technical explanations that yes, the garment style is a skirt, but when it's worn with a sporran and by a man, it's a kilt.

[opositive]

i thought of two new replies to add:

to a male--something that will give you nightmares

to a female--something from your dreams

[Dale Seago]

"This particular kilt is in the R'lyeh Sett, and my last name's Whateley. You don't really want to know. . .

. . .Unless you have a thing for tentacles."

[Old Hippie]

Once when dressed definitely "contemporary" (steel-toed boots, canvas kilt, t-shirt and a ball-cap) I was complimented by a woman on my "skirt." Her companion immediately corrected her and she got all embarrassed. I decided a little humour might lighten things up a little and said, "Ladies, you're close. It'd be a skirt if I was wearing panties." Then I explained it was a kilt, even though it didn't "have all those lines on it" and everything was fine.

I've gotten the "Are ye 'true Scots?'" question a few times. The first time I thought they were wondering if I was "allowed" to wear the kilt and so gave them an puzzling answer. Once I understood that the subtext was, "Airin' the Boys, are you?" I have habitually answered with "You betcher sweet bippy!"

(The "Laugh-In" reference should tell you that I have the sort of gravitas that does not encourage young women to lift my kilt. I've been kilt-checked by some of the older ones, though. They do it so fast you wonder what happened. No standing there with your kilt up around your ears while they squeal and point cameras!)

[rondo]

Yeah. It's never really happened to me. I must hang out in the wrong places. Can't wait!

Might be the collar Padre. Just sayin'.
Rondo

[Shedlock2000]

Well, I have had a myriad of different comments depending mostly on where I was in the world. I have had some girls ask in a line up for a club once "if they could look as to what was under a 'true Scot's man's's kilt". Luckily, there was a female police officer next to the door, and I replied: "certainly you can, but first, you ask her [pointing to the officer]. To the officers credit, she replied "If its ok with him, its ok with me". I fell to attention, the deed was done, the cooing commenced, and all was well.

However, what I don't like is the stolen look - the flick or the lift of the hem without permission. I get vexed at that as I often go regimental, and I have no desire to get into any legal drama.

To the questions:
"Are you Scottish or something"? - 'about a 1000 years of us are, and if you fancy quibbling with 800 generations of the dead, have at her'.

"What do you wear then"? - "as little as possible, for as long as possible."

"why are you wearing a kilt"? - "have you seen how fantastic my knees are?; best knees on the planet these! - I gotta get them out for humanities sake"

"What is worn under a kilt" - "There's nought worrn unner th' kil; its' all in perf'ct workin orrder", or " boots and a knife"

or - if the same question is confrontational - "are you inquiring about the dirk, or the dick?"

The real answer is, it depends upon the questioner! but mostly, I like to be funny - its what we ought to do I think as representatives of our heritage. I often comment - "We Scottish invented drinking, fighting, and partying - but not necessarily in that order; so don't you want to find out what sort of a mood I am in before you ask that question?"

[sacluded]

"Ladies, you're close. It'd be a skirt if I was wearing panties."

I've used very close to this myself.

I said to one guy that just wouldn't let it go, "Let me ask you this. Are you going to be telling your friends later how you were beat up by a guy in a "skirt?"

[TheOfficialBren]

Ha! That's quite a story, Shedlock.

I have a new one to add to the tales here.

I was at a professional event in Beverly Hills where people are *usually* a bit classier. A Japanese woman who is a the lead singer in a band in Hollywierd (I'll let you guys deduce which one, and it won't be difficult to do) asked me several times, each time becoming more persistant. Here was the order of my responses:

1) "Ladies don't ask and gentlemen don't declare."
2) "That's a bit personal, don't you think?"
3) "Since I'm tired of you asking, I'll show you mine if you show me yours."

She indignantly stomped off and complained to my manager who was present and asked if I am always so "brazen." My manager smoothed things over but said that it was highly inappropriate of her to ask that question...three times, no less.
Who's the brazen one here and did she bother looking up the definition of "brazen?"

Oh, well. That's one of my only negative experiences. One would think that in a business setting that one would have more courtesy and consideration for other professionals.

Oh well. Her music sucked and her voice was terrible anyway. She won't last long in Hollywood, especially with a duplicitous attitude.

[Iain Robb]

At church the other day I got, "Your skirt is shorter than hers!"

I replied, "I have better knees."

Then on a recent Saturday I heard from behind me, "Nice skirt!"

I turned to see a teenager running to catch up with his friends. Clearly a man of his convictions.

But it did prompt the lovely lass next to me to say, "I think it is a very nice kilt," and strike up a conversation. So I didn't hold it against the cowardly lad.