First Time Denied

[Sturdy]

I know how you feel, here I went to Edinboro - PA that is - and my daughter who is attending college there said I couldn't wear my kilt - now that is a disappointment as I was going to walk around the college and town in my kilt. Ah well - I'll get even with her one day - maybe graduation day LOL.

[O'Callaghan]

I think that most formal events specify the level of formality, and it is readily apparent that it is possible to dress in a kilt for each such level, i.e. you can always dress in a kilt and still comply. Now, sometimes they might be more specific, often because they themselves are unsure what the different terms of formality actually mean. Then they might say something like lounge suit or dinner suit (=tux, for our American friends). You can still figure out how to dress at the equivalent level in a kilt, even if you have to look it up.

As far as I can see, the only real exception to the above is if you are going to be seen and/or photographed in a prominent position. Then you might want to ask some questions.

Of course, there is also the issue of whether you can afford to dress the way they want, and then I think the only advice is to get as close as you can.

Not perhaps quite germane to weddings, but so many times I have been told to wear a dark suit to funerals, and I have never owned one. Under those circumstances I have simply worn a light coloured lounge suit with a dark tie and sometimes with a black shirt. No-one has ever said that wasn't appropriate. They were just pleased I could be there.

[Father Bill]

O'Callaghan, there's a lot of wisdom in what you write. I would however quibble with a small part of it: While no-one may say anything, I am always concerned that I may give offense unnecessarily (something worth avoiding if possible) while others are too polite to comment.

To me, lack of comment is not often a reliable indicator.

[OC Richard]

Weddings are a different animal here, I suspect.

(Note the zorries.)

[Father Bill]

Richard, the west coast of Canada differs from the rest of the nation in similar ways. Normal dress for a funeral in Vancouver or Victoria is a polo shirt and slacks. In Ontario, a lounge suit, preferably black or navy.

[ctbuchanan]

I know how you feel, here I went to Edinboro - PA that is - and my daughter who is attending college there said I couldn't wear my kilt - now that is a disappointment as I was going to walk around the college and town in my kilt. Ah well - I'll get even with her one day - maybe graduation day LOL.

That seems odd as they host a pretty big highland festival there every September. You would think people would be used to the kilt.

[seanachie]

O'Callaghan, there's a lot of wisdom in what you write. I would however quibble with a small part of it: While no-one may say anything, I am always concerned that I may give offense unnecessarily (something worth avoiding if possible) while others are too polite to comment.

To me, lack of comment is not often a reliable indicator.

Late to the party on this one...but I have had just a few occasions this occurred. One was for my mother's 85th birthday and I deferred to her wishes, and I have no regrets on that one. In one or two other circumstances, because I am known as a kilt wearer someone has said something about not wearing the kilt and I chose not to accept the invite in the vein expressed by CDN Sushi, in another I complied because I was only being invited as the spouse. (I did make it easy for my wife, as I offered before she asked.)

[Bluescelt]

Sturdy, They must be used to kilts and piping as the University has a pipe band. Our clan piper is a student there.

[Macman]

Richard, the west coast of Canada differs from the rest of the nation in similar ways. Normal dress for a funeral in Vancouver or Victoria is a polo shirt and slacks. In Ontario, a lounge suit, preferably black or navy.

That's what I find as well. It's the same for weddings. There are still some of us that dress more like Ontarians, though.

[CDNSushi]

Richard, the west coast of Canada differs from the rest of the nation in similar ways. Normal dress for a funeral in Vancouver or Victoria is a polo shirt and slacks. In Ontario, a lounge suit, preferably black or navy.

And yet, whenever I go to the opera, ballet, or theatre, I find more people than not, dressed to the nines. In Victoria we still have a lot of old money and the families who go with it as well. I cannot compare that with weddings or funerals though, as I haven't attended either, since having returned to Canada.