And they call themselves men ...

[Magnus Sporrano]

Honestly this is probably paybacks for the pendulum swinging so far against men during the civil rights movement.

I still hold doors, surrender seats, etc. But really I've had a few feminazi types who actually take offense to old fashioned manners like this, as if I'm trying to opress them somehow by holding a door.

[Livingston]

Whenever I opened the door for my ex-wife it ticked her off. I kept telling her that I was raised to be a gentleman which means to open doors for women, give up seats to women and the elderly, and just generally being polite. Guess that's part of why she's my ex.

[longshadows]

Regardless, younger women will still accept the gesture of offering a seat or opening the door. Problem is, like a lot of the younger guys, who don't bother to offer a lady their seat; some of the younger women will accept your gesture without even a "thank you."

I might be tempted to stereotype and say that "the younger generation" is selfish or less thoughtful than our own, but as soon as I do, someone in that younger generation proves me wrong.

One the other hand, perhaps it was/is our own generation who didn't do a very good job of installing the value of courtesy and regard for others in their children. ("What goes around comes around.")

[Pour1Malt]

aye yur richt there Michael....

[flyv65]

I ride mass transit a good bit here in Denver, and I gladly offer my seat to the elderly, infirm or handicapped: but I've long since ceased to offer my seat to someone simply based on their sex...likewise, I hold doors for everybody and let all others enter first. This is different than how I was raised (slightly, anyways), but I've become comfortable with this approach and it doesn't seem to offend too many people on either side of this divide (I've been chastized by women for offering them a seat more often than I've been yelled at by them for *not* offering, believe it or not).

Bryan...are we individualists for wearing kilts and conformists for following society's mores, or is each situation unique in itself? I'm of mixed emotions on this whole topic...

[davedove]

I ride mass transit a good bit here in Denver, and I gladly offer my seat to the elderly, infirm or handicapped: but I've long since ceased to offer my seat to someone simply based on their sex...likewise, I hold doors for everybody and let all others enter first. This is different than how I was raised (slightly, anyways), but I've become comfortable with this approach and it doesn't seem to offend too many people on either side of this divide (I've been chastized by women for offering them a seat more often than I've been yelled at by them for *not* offering, believe it or not).

That's more my approach as well, not really chivalry but instead good manners to all.

[chasem]

My father was in the us air force when I was growing up until my early teens or so. He and my mother always taught me to be a gentleman. Ladies first, hold the door, offer any assistance, etc. As a result, that stuck with me at 21 now, I still open doors, give out seats, pull out the chair for a date, whatever I can to be a gentleman.

I get so frustrated when other guys don't hold open doors for ladies, and even more frustrated at the times I have held open the door for someone (lady or older man even) and not hear so much as a sarcastic "thanks pal" even.

What drives me up the wall the most is the women who, upon having a door opened for them, responds with "I can do it for myself!"

So many times I want to let a snappy retort fly, but a) I'd rather continue being a gentleman and b) I can't think of any

[mbhandy]

Good manners is parents responsiblity and there are a lot of people out there who don't have them. I worked with drug, gang and AA Kids for 16 years and part of our mission was to teach respect and trust. Most of the kids I worked with were good kids but no training or little respect for themselves or others.
My only peve was when they would call me Sir (call my father Sir) with that funny tone in their voice.
I see people all the time open doors or help other people with packages or luggage. Live in a resort town and they don't expect a tip, just good manners.

Sure there are people out there that don't have or refuse to use good social graces, some of it is culture.
Enought Rant, and I do open doors and give up seats, But don't call me sir, I work for a living. :rolleyes:


MrBill

[UmAnOnion]

Gonna play devil's advocate here:

I have had more than a few women snap at me for trying to be 'chivalrous' and 'gallant' for offering up a seat or holding a door on the like. While i will agree that it is only proper to make an accomodation for someone with a disability or physical challenge, if someone is equally abled as I, regardless of gender, should they not be treated the same. So, IMHO, holding a door, giving up your seat as appropriate and the like should be done for everyone not just 'the weaker sex'. especially when the 'weaker' sex isnt weaker after all.


that being said i find that there is a universal decline in courtesy in general. No one says thank you or please anymore. People push past you instead of saying "excuse me". and dont get me started on shop clerks who grunt instead of replying when greeted. people braying into cell phones as if the world needs to hear thier conversations, and then giving you dirty looks if you ask them to quiet down. its a sad sad sad state of affiars on the whole - makes me appreciate the good manners & fine breeding of (most of) the people on here

Cheers

[Tony]

Don't forget gentlemen.....

In addition to opening doors, giving up seats, etc etc


ALWAYS put the seat down!