Joke: Warning, don't drink while reading

[Dirka Skene]

One day Wee Hughie bought a bottle of fine whiskey and while walking home he fell.

Getting up he felt something wet on his pants.

He looked up at the sky and said,"Oh lord please I beg you let it be blood!"

[McMurdo]

ARRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRGH! I saw it coming and still scolled down!

Same here but at least I'm not the only one

[ccga3359]

Did you hear about poor old Robertson who fell down the stairs with a entire bottle of scotch without spilling a drop?...










...He kept his mouth shut!

[Andrew Breecher]

A Scottish lad takes out the local sweetie on a walk across the hills. As they admire the view he says to her, "Why don't you take a peek under my kilt?"

She says, "No, no, I couldn't do that."

"Please?"

"Well, all right." She lifts his kilt and cries out, "Ach, it's gruesome!"

He says, "Lift it again, it just grew some more."

[Eujeankilt]

Ha!
A teenage Scottish lad went to a local tailor to pick out a tartan for his first kilt.
"This is good sir, I'd like me first kilt made o' this one here. An' I wouldn't mind a pair o' matchin' undies too."
The tailor shrugged his shoulders and said, "Okay, I'll call ya when der done."
A few days later, the tailor called the lad and told him that his kilt and underwear were done. The lad raced to the tailor to pick up his order.
Tailor, "There's aboot five yards left, keep it 'case you want somethin' else made of it."
The boy rushed home excited to show his girlfriend. He put on his kilt, but he was so excited he forgot to put on his matching underwear.
He ran to his girlfriends house and banged on the door.
When she answered he said, "Ya like it?!"
She said, "Aye, it's lovely."
The 'regimental' lad tossed up the front of his kilt, "An' this?"
She said, "Aye, that's dandy too!"
He said,"Well, if ya like that, there's five more yards of it at home!"

You've got to warn us lass. Good thing I wasn't drinkng anything...


Good one.


Dale