First Kilt and the Wife

[Robert Lamb]

I suprised my wife in a kilt.
She had gone to Mexico to visit family. When she returned I picked her up wearing a kilt I had rented from a costume rental place, and boy was she suprised! After all the years of wearing a kilt she still brings this up. So no "suprises"
Robert "the kilted" Lamb

[pdcorlis]

My personal rule? Communication is the key to happiness - and NO wife suprises unless its tickets to Hawaii in the dead of winter.

[IEScotsman]

The surprise was your first mistake. Your second mistake may have been not going back to the bedroom to change before the event. While a kilted outfit and lifestyle can be fun and exciting, it probably rubbed salt in the wound for your wife to defend her husband to others when she didn't like the idea in the first place.

For your sake, explain to your wife why you want to wear the kilt (then tell us!). Make her a part of the process, not a bystander. Tell her what the tartan means to you, why you wanted to surprise her, etc. At the very least, she should appreciate the explanation, despite its tardiness.

Good luck, and I assume you may be a church-going family, so maybe you can show your wife this: http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=fxvQZbEOX9g

[Uncle Ricky]

this, but no.

As to the experience, wow, I loved it. There were the usual queries including "the question" twice (to which I asked the older ladies "as long as I can ask you what you're wearing" and they blushed, and one feeble attempt at a lift from a goofy guy I know.

Peace to you, Chris

Greetings Chris

Your wife may come around in time, as long as she doesn't think you look goofy. Pay attention to overall grooming when wearing the kilt, and you will improve your chances greatly.

As to how to handle "The Question", I have found that one of the best responses is "A gentleman Never Tells"

Suggestive or lewd responses are not only demeaning to the inquirer, but to you as well. Such responses are sure to get back to your wife sooner or later, and you may never recover her favor.

Just my two cents,

Cheers,
Rick

[RockyR]

Good to have you with us, Chris!

To reiterate AND expound a bit on what many here have said... communication is the key AND you shouldn't have surprised her. That being said, you are currently in the situation and can't turn back time.

Here's a novel idea (especially for hard headed men like me)... Sit down with her and APOLOGIZE for surprising her. Admit it was something you should have discussd first, but you were afraid she'd have a completely negative reaction to it. Go into the reasons why you think it's something you want to wear to formal events (or less formal ones).

Refer the wife to XMARKS! Let her read up on how WE feel about the kilt and show her that you're not alone... there are HUNDREDS of us who think just like you!

Take her to a Celtic Festival and get her used to the idea of men in Kilts. She'll warm up slowly (or at least be less cold to the idea).

Respect her wishes and ask her to respect yours. Come to some kind of compromise about it... maybe wear it out to a nice dinner once a month or every other month. Ask her if she'd wear a kilted skirt and offer to BUY HER ONE (presents always help situations like this).


Just my $.02.

[Prester John]

Welcome aboard, Chris.

Things aren't always what they seem, especially with women.

She'll surprise you, just surprise her in every good way.

[Macman]

Oops! Maybe the thread should be "First wife and the kilt". Sorry, but I just couldn't resist.
Seriously, I think Rocky is right about the apology. I think it would go a long way. My wife met me after I began wearing kilts, but I still run it by her (that I plan on wearing a kilt) if we're going out somewhere special. It's not that I'm asking for permission, but I value her input, and she respects that. Maybe you can come to some common ground with your wife on where she would feel comfortable with you wearing your kilt out.
Finally, welcome to the forum, and congratulations on your fine new kilt!

[Raptor]

In my experience, most women do NOT like surprises! Unless they involve gemstones, chocolate, or theatre tickets (tongue in cheek, ladies!) Communication is probably the first basic survival skill when it comes to the fairer sex. I was fortunate in that my wife is a born & bred Celt, & it was her prompting that led me to wearing my kilt in other than a formal situation. As mentioned above, show her this forum, or get her to check out the number of movie stars etc who regularly show up to society bashes kilted. Give her some time, she'll get to like it!

[SnakeEyes]

Its been said already, but the surprise was a bad idea. We men have a habit of just doing things we think are cool and not really thinking about how the women in our lives feel. Imagine, for instance, if she had announced 5 minutes before an outing that she was going out in her scivvies (I know, a bit of a radical comparison). Say she just went on her merry way, not showing any consideration for your feelings. How would you react?

[Blu (Ontario)]

I recommend

http://www.kiltmen.com/wives.htm0

as a kilt wearers primer for such situations.

.Good luck.