First Kilt Check

[Finn]

Wife would be endlessly amused by my chagrin.

[gseven1]

I never knew there was supposed to be a "correct" way to kilt check someone. But I imagine it would go something like this:

"Hi! Are you wearing any underwear?"

"Well! That's a mighty forward question, and really none of your business."

"Oh, sorry."

There you go, kilt check correctly performed.

I completely agree, this is the proper way to check a kilt. When you read stories of unwanted kilt checks, it makes you wonder where a person's sense of respect has gone.

[Smayniac]

Somewhere in there is why I don't tell my wife that I go regimental.

Don't ask, don't tell is a viable policy in some arenas.

I was asked one day by my estranged wife, our eight year old was flaunting his regimental nature, I won't post that pic on a family forum. She was quite put out with both of us. In her defense, it was a very windy boxing day in Monterey; we were on our way to Acme Coffee for Kilt Day. I do have a forum friendly shot of Scooby with his jeans on under the kilt later on the way to the Aquarium, and his mom ended up wearing that kilt as a baboushka later.

Bob

[Dixiecat]

I do find it funny though, how it is seen as socially acceptable for a woman to kilt check a guy

I do not find it socially acceptable to lift anyone's 'skirts' in public, let alone a strange man's kilt (hmmm, is that why I'm single?), or even bother to ask what they wear underneath their kilt. Afterall, the way I look at it, everyone is naked under their clothes so I already know the answer to the question.

[Galb]

I do not find it socially acceptable to lift anyone's 'skirts' in public, let alone a strange man's kilt (hmmm, is that why I'm single?), or even bother to ask what they wear underneath their kilt. Afterall, the way I look at it, everyone is naked under their clothes so I already know the answer to the question.

Well, to each their own. I myself would probably laugh it off, or ask the woman to return the favor (if she was attractive and young) jokingly, of course. Usually, if I get the question I direct the curious party to my wife. I have had women, however, warn me and my wife that it might be a good idea for me to stay away at a party or they won't be able to resist finding out the answer, especially when they get some drinks in them. It is amazing what a kilt will do to some women and their inhibitions. But as I said, to each their own.

[Alan H]

I have ranted on this topic before, about what a revolting violation of anyones personal rights it is, for any other person to shove their hand up a kilt without permission.

I'll spare you all the rant.

[Detroitpete]

Been asked...and tested.

The only times I'm not regimental are when I'm competing in highland games (my spin technique disolves all opportunity for modesty) and when its brrrrrrrrrrr cold here in Michigan and I'm hiking.

I've been asked the question so many times I usually respond without thinking. For me, simple short phrases said with a smile and a hint at the you'd-better-not-push-it-further look seem to settle the matter. Typical responses are:

Only my boots and shoes.
Yes I'm regimental/traditional/REAL etc fill in the blank with whatever insinuation they make.

Here's one that should only be used if you don't mind the night taking a weird turn: Feel the tug on youre kilt...turn and say "go any further without asking and we begin the public spankings right here--right now" This actully did turn out weird when first deployed.

My favorite thing to do when feeling the 'tug'--point to my wife and say "you see that beautiful half Celt, half German, protective Goddess with that certain fire in her eyes over there? Go ask her if she would like you to continue".

When the sneak attack has hit me--I do my best to say "I'm sorry but that was extremely rude and inexcusable. Even if you thought it was cute or funny, you just proved to everyone here your total lack of class"

My wife made me practice that over and over ;-)

We now tend to stay pretty close to one another if we're going into a drunken-woman likely enviroment.

P.S. Best kilt-check request I ever got: Playing at the Games, two women yell to me and tell me to take off my gloves. I walk to the fence line and ask "What??? Why???" They say, "We want to know if there is someone we should ask...before our next question" I smile, took off my glove, showed my wedding ring and pointed to my wife. She waved and yelled back "Honey, did you put on clean shorts this morning" Whole crowd within earshot laughed.

[Highlander31]

Over the years, I've been asked the question and had some checks. I have yet to have someone who was offensive, and my wife has never had to explain the facts to another woman (which she is quite capable of doing.)

The funniest check that I can remember happened at a Renaissance party my wife and I hosted. I was chatting with several people when they all began to smile. Before I could ask what they were smiling at, my wife called to me from across the room and suggested I turn around. When I did, I discovered one of our friends (who was three sheets to the wind) squatted down behind me trying to position her digital camera under my kilt. Realizing she had been caught, she immediately started trying to come up with a plausible reason for being behind me with a digital camera under my kilt. I'm not sure which was the brighter red that night,..my MacGregor kilt or her face after being caught.

My wife (who has been a light in my life for over 36 years) and I are always amazed when strange women come up to us ask what's under the kilt. I guess you can only say,...It's a kilt thing.

[oscagne]

All my kilt-checks have been in SCA-related revelry environments. The first was two ladies who made plain that it was very serious flirting and there have been other less interesting ones since. I've never been placed in a situation where it was non-consensual... maybe that just says something about the caliber of ladies in the SCA.

There is a whole lady-only household in these parts (Amazons) who have made it one of their missions to detect non-regimental kilt-wearers - upon whose discovery a metric bevy of ladies will cut off the offending underwear and cast them into the nearest fire. And even though they don't ask permission, they move in a slow and deliberate enough manner that any kilted gentleman has plenty of opportunity to either object or run away.