One Sunday morning, on the Isle of Lewis, the minister of the Wee Free church was giving his flock a powerful speech on the evil of the demon drink. His booming voice and sharp, piercing eyes went into the soul of everyone there. But action speaks louder than words, so he arranged a demonstration.

He pulled a wee jar out from behind the altar, held it up and said “Here in this jar I have some worms wriggling about, as you can plainly see !”

Then bringing out a glass and a jug of water, he pours the water into the jug and says “Look at this glass into which I have poured God’s own pure, clear water. Now I will put a worm into that glass”. He plops a worm into the glass and holding it up, says “You see ? the worm is swimming around in the water, happy and healthy !”

Then he brings out a glass and a half-bottle of whisky, then pours some into the glass. He says “Now here in this glass I have poured some of that Devil’s brew, uisge mhath, which I confiscated from a sinner yesterday ! Now look what happens when I put a worm in there !!” He drops in a worm and holds up the glass. The worm spins around and twists and turns a few times, then goes straight as a rod against the wall of the glass.

The minister shouts triumphantly “See ? The worm is stone dead, killed by that evil Satan’s urine !!! So – what does this tell you ???”

Everyone looks at each other and at the flagstone floor then at the back of the wee church, old Calum speaks up “Well Minister, it means that if you drink enough whisky, you won’t get worms !”