Clever Comebacks

**rollerboy_1979** · 30th January 10, 11:32 AM

I'm pretty good at clever comebacks, many of which I've culled from my kilted brothers and sisters on this site. One of my favorite comebacks to the age old question is, "I'm naked under all my clothes". And when asked by a guy who happens to be with a lady, I usually say, "It's funny you should ask, because I'm usually asked by women and a few gay men". The latter usually shuts them up quickly and makes them turn beet red.

Recently, I've had a comment that has me stumped, so I'm seeking your help. I dress traditionally, ie, hose, flashes, sgian dub, etc., and a couple of people have asked, on separate occasions, "Is there a parade or something?", to which I respond, "No, I just enjoy wearing the kilt". Now, that question begs for a clever answer, but I'm coming up empty. Any ideas?

Cheers!
John

**mull** · 30th January 10, 12:18 PM

It's a fine line between clever and antagonistic. I suppose how clever you can be is a function of how well you box.

**ronstew** · 30th January 10, 12:40 PM

Mull, I don't know you, but already I like you.

Nothing wrong with saying, "No, I just like wearing a kilt," when asked a polite question.

Rude questions are another matter.

**BEEDEE** · 30th January 10, 01:09 PM

"Is there a parade or something?"

Only if you want to follow me!"

Brian

**Riverkilt** · 30th January 10, 02:29 PM

"Yes, a parade of common sense and FREEDOM!!"

I usually just say what you say, "No - I enjoy wearing the kilt."

Or you can say yes and toss in the dates of the next nearby Highland Games.

If you wanna really befuddle them then after they ask look at your watch and give them the time. See if they point out that's not what they said. After you can say, "Oh, I heard you wrong, sorry, today is - " and give them the day of the week.

Chances are they'll walk away...

**thatcelticband** · 30th January 10, 02:57 PM

My fav comeback to "whats under your kilt" is "on a good day, lipstick"

**Detroitpete** · 30th January 10, 03:00 PM

"...Parade? Yep. It ended here at the pub. They said you were buying"

**Mael Coluim** · 30th January 10, 03:13 PM

Originally Posted by Detroitpete

"...Parade? Yep. It ended here at the pub. They said you were buying"

int:

**KiltedHuntsman** · 30th January 10, 03:35 PM

My standard response to "What's under your kilt?" is, "I'm a man of few words. Give me your hand" and move toward them slightly...

That usually shuts them up.

**kid icarus** · 30th January 10, 05:10 PM

HA! the under the kilt questions when i was single were a lot easier....plus, some ended up quite nicely

. i usually just said why don't you find out for yourself to the ladies. but hey, i was single and young back then. so all's fair as they say, right? to the gents i'd ask "honestly, do you really want to know?" while giving them are you kidding me look.

as for is there a parade? i have no real good comeback on hand for that. if i thought about it i'd probably come back with something like, "no (pause and look at whomever is asking the question like sizing them up) is there a stupid convention in town or something?