Etiquette lessons?

[Drac]

I have a very limited alcohol intake - a little dark rum, and if I ever find it again I would buy a slightly sparkling white wine called Moscato d'Asti, but I have not seen it for some time. That is best drunk very cold when in a hot bath with either really ripe mangoes or peaches to hand.

Drinking alone is perceived as unhealthy, but I find alcohol and company are best enjoyed separately. This normally results in my having to drive around taking people home.

Anne Croucher :ootd:

Sorry folks, I love scotch but rum is better. Anne, have you ever tried Barbancourt? It is a Haitian rhum (made from sugar cane not molasses) that a co-worker from Haiti brought back for me. The first bottle is an 8 year old, the next will be (I believe) 15 year old. Trust me it is amazing.

Jim

[ohiopiper]

Until my late twenties I had considerable difficulty observing correct table etiquette. Not that I hadn't been taught good manners by my parents (mother in particular) but that I grew up in what may best be described as a hodgepodge of cultures and corresponding manners.

Germans, Hungarians, Jews, Slovaks, Poles, one Romanian family, two families from Brazil, a slew of Mexicans (how I learned to enjoy spicy food as a kid) a Chinese family and two Japanese households. You learned a bit of everybody's manners as it was and remains a very gregarious community. I still enjoy visiting friends and relatives there and my son (6 years) is awed by the variety of food and dining customs.

So every Sunday afternoon you either went to someone's house for dinner or had someone over to your house. Sometimes midweek, too. Dining manners were dictated by where you were and everyone cut everyone else a lot of slack due to the community situation. Hence my early confusion. If it was acceptable anywhere in the civilized world, it was acceptable at the dinner table. Usually.

My wife finds visiting my childhood home an enjoyably trippy experience. The woman I dated before I married my wife was appalled. So I dumped her.

[ohiopiper]

Just as examples, I can remember being in houses for dinner where the men filled their plates, then the women, then the kids. Another house usually had two different sets of food on the table. Something special for the man of the house and company, macaroni and cheese (or equivalent) for the wife and kids. A very good friend of my Grandfather had a strict policy of no talking at the table. You sat down, ate, then went to the parlor or den to visit. Grace and "Pass the XYZ" was the only thing acceptable.

Some homes were formal dining on a daily basis. Dinner was served at a set time, always had multiple courses and you were expected to "dress for dinner", even on a Saturday afternoon. Other places were informal, even on what would normally be a formal occassion.

I remember being confused the first time I had dinner at a friends house, the chicken smelled wonderful and the plates were big (always a good sign, I like to eat) but there was no flatware. Everything was eaten on a tortilla. Tear off a piece, scoop the good stuff onto the rest of the tortilla and chow down.

[Lallans]

I've heard of the men-eating-first thing from Pioneer days. My grandmother used to say that this procedure was the women's choice since space was limited in the days of big families and hired hands- and it allowed the women to get the oafs (not her word) out of the house and them to have a more relaxed meal.

[MacMillan of Rathdown]

Wildrover the second type of meal that I described are actually not so rare over here and I suppose in the shooting season I will partake, in one form or another, four or five of those a week in various abodes around the UK.

Reason #1 that I sometimes wish I still lived in Ireland and Scotland.

[MacMillan of Rathdown]

1) cold asparagus may be eaten with the fingers;
2) when in Rome, etc., elsewhere a spoon and fork are always used when eating noodles;
3) cut your food into small bites, one piece at a time;
4) a bit of gristle should be disposed of in the same manner as a fish bone- remove it from your mouth with your fork (or spoon if eating a stew, pie, or soup) and place it on the shoulder of the plate... do not wrap it up in the napkin;
4) when leaving the table for a moment or so, always place you napkin on your chair, not on the table;
5) at the conclusion of the meal place your napkin on the table, to the left of your plate (under no circumstances should it be folded).

[JerseyLawyer]

1) cold asparagus may be eaten with the fingers;
2) when in Rome, etc., elsewhere a spoon and fork are always used when eating noodles;
3) cut your food into small bites, one piece at a time;
4) a bit of gristle should be disposed of in the same manner as a fish bone- remove it from your mouth with your fork (or spoon if eating a stew, pie, or soup) and place it on the shoulder of the plate... do not wrap it up in the napkin;
4) when leaving the table for a moment or so, always place you napkin on your chair, not on the table;
5) at the conclusion of the meal place your napkin on the table, to the left of your plate (under no circumstances should it be folded).

I disagree with #1, but I've already given my reasons for that. Still, cold asparagus is indeed firm, so we're making only a small distinction.

As for #4, I agree - I've always been taught that the inedible piece comes out the same way it went in. If you're eating with a fork or spoon, it goes back onto it, then goes onto the edge of the plate for later disposal.

Otherwise, we're in complete agreement. :P

Though it's also always been my feeling that a polite host does not serve his or her guests a meal which will become a gastronomic obstacle course. While sometimes it can't be avoided, I try to avoid serving a meal where every element of the dish has it's own specialized eating utensil.

[Jack Daw]

PEAS & FORK.

Alright here we go, UK style fork skills! First you stab a mouth sized piece of meat(tines down)then with your knife you load(by pushing gently the fork and knife together) on top of the meat some potato/swede/carrot and then with your knife you push some peas into the potato etc and onto the fork just above the meat. YOU DO NOT END UP WITH MUSHY PEAS! And then the whole caboodle is raised to the mouth. Easy really, when you get the load and loading right!

Wildrover the second type of meal that I described are actually not so rare over here and I suppose in the shooting season I will partake, in one form or another, four or five of those a week in various abodes around the UK.

Here, I have to admit to an element of my peculair eating habits. On my plate the peas and mashed potatoes must remain separate and unmixed...unless, I am eating some casserole or shepherd's pie that already has them mixed together.

[Mike_Oettle]

ECHAlum wrote: “Here in Virginia, Bar-b-que is a Noun and not a Verb.”

In South Africa, the word braai is an English noun and a verb.
The word is derived from the Afrikaans braaivleis. A braaivleis (English usage) means the same as barbecue, although the styles of food and presentation differ, not only from US practice but also from region to region in this country.
In Afrikaans, braaivleis literally means barbecued meat, while a barbecue (noun) is called a vleisbraai. But in (South African) English, braaivleis is also both noun and verb.
We generally braai on a grid, rather than a griddle plate.
Side dishes often encountered include a dry porridge made of what folk in the US call corn, but we know it as mealiepap – it is much like grits, but not exactly the same. (Mealies is our word for corn on the cob – delicious!) This word comes from the Afrikaans mielie (origin obscure).
Dry mealiepap is also called putu pap (that word is of Bantu origin). Putu pap is served with a tomato and onion sauce.
Also popular is having a potjie (literally a small pot, often a three-legged iron pot). Most people who have a potjie pot have a proprietary recipe or three – various ingredients can be used for the stew that is cooked alongside the braai fire.
Regards,
Mike

[Tobus]

Here, I have to admit to an element of my peculair eating habits. On my plate the peas and mashed potatoes must remain separate and unmixed...unless, I am eating some casserole or shepherd's pie that already has them mixed together.

Same here. I am borderline neurotic about my food not touching. My wife even jokingly bought me a cafeteria-style divided tray so I wouldn't have to worry about my food touching.

The thought of having to mash all my food together like baby food, just to pick it up and eat it, is a little bit disgusting.