Trying not to get angry at co-worker

[Cherub]

One of those lines that my friend and I don't cross- ever- is making fun of each other's children. What kind of worthless coward does that? Seriously!

Next time you wear your kilt, have those poms handy so you can give him his little puff balls back. Tell him he should try to re attach them.



No, of course not. Those others are people with cultures. We're white- the only culture we have is the mayonaise on our white bread and turkey breast sandwiches. I was actually told that- that my kilt is not cultural because I'm white. And if you look at it, that's the general attitude of society. We have black this, latino that, but call something white (like a history month) and see what happens.

That's kind of what happens when you are a non-visible minority.

I've had to defend my culture to gentles most of my life.

[Nighthawk]

I think that this sounds like an HR issue. I had to make a sexual harassment complaint against a male co worker. That ended things. Also, I posted a large printout of the definition of the word "stupidity" in my work area. The definition I used was "stupid - unintelligent: lacking intelligence; "a dull job with lazy and unintelligent co-workers." Along with this definition of the word Ignorant : "ignorance - the lack of knowledge or education." I then concluded at the end of my printed out decoration with "Ignorant people simply don't know, while stupid people refuse to learn. Ignorance is understandable- stupidity is pathetic." That seemed to help a bit.

[Larry124]

I might consider it a dumb but not necessarily mean joke in the category of teasing.

And then I’d return the favor. Revenge is a dish best served cold.
What does HE wear?
Hawaiian shirts? Bring him a lei.
Holed jeans? Bring him some iron-on patches or a book on hobo lore.
Scuffed shoes? Shoe polish or a brush.
Cowboy hat or boots? Bring him some spurs or a lasso/lariat or a plastic sheriff's badge.
Almost everyone displays at least a little bit of clothing eccentricity. Use your imagination.

If you think that it was mean spirited then you might go full schoolyard.
Is he bald, short, fat, wear glasses, etc? Those are the traditional opportunities for teasing.

Consequences: Of course as in (USA) football it’s usually the retaliation that draws the penalty.

[RedBeard]

Tell him to go**** himself. and tell his woman that you you hope her legs grow together. That will work.

[Kerr the Walker]

I've used this one and it seemed to work: "All of your joke making privelages have been revoked. All jokes must be submitted in writing, and if I haven't heard them a million times, you will be granted permission to voice said joke outloud. Until permission is granted, please keep all stupid comments to yourself.".

Said it with a genuine smile on my face. Haven't gotten any static since.

[Mr. bone]

I've used this one and it seemed to work: "All of your joke making privelages have been revoked. All jokes must be submitted in writing, and if I haven't heard them a million times, you will be granted permission to voice said joke outloud.

Very nice. I have responded in the past to people by staring at them for a few seconds and then saying, "droll...how very very droll"

[bricelythgoe]

I've used this one and it seemed to work: "All of your joke making privelages have been revoked. All jokes must be submitted in writing, and if I haven't heard them a million times, you will be granted permission to voice said joke outloud. Until permission is granted, please keep all stupid comments to yourself.".

Said it with a genuine smile on my face. Haven't gotten any static since.

Just sent that message to him. Thanks for the idea.

[Kerr the Walker]

Just sent that message to him. Thanks for the idea.

Glad to help. Hope things work out and this guy finally grows up.

I must say, you did much better than I would. Like you, I can handle people giving me static about pretty much anything, but my family is a different matter entirely. I would probably been fired for giving this goon a dose of concrete gourmet for a jab at family.

[JimB]

My bonnet is off to you sir. I'm afraid I would have had to say something but that's me.
It is best to leave it alone, and put as much distance as you can between you and he.

[meinfs]

I am really to the point where I want to strangle one of my co-workers. Today, for valentines day, this person brought me a gift bag with pom-poms in it. He said that I could use them when I put my “skirt” on. Even his girlfriend, who was with him at the time, said I could give them to my son and he could cheer for me in his “skirt” (I plan on getting my 3 ½ year old a kilt soon). They think this is so funny, but I am not laughing. There were students present when he gave it to me, so I had to hold back a little bit. I would like to know what you guys would have done in this situation. I have to work with this guy, so I don’t want to make a big deal. However, maybe I should. Let me know what you think!

I think a more direct approach might be more effective. Take him (them) aside and tell them that you do not find their "skirt" comments funny and *ask* that they stop. If you don't object to their jokes about you, they'll think it's okay and will keep doing it. Good luck.