So often asked

[Kilt_Em_All]

I went to lunch with three (male) friends and I happened to be wearing a kilt that day. Of course they had to give me a hard time about it, and inevitably they wanted to know whether I was regimental or not. My response was simply "Don't ask questions if you don't want to know the answer." When I offered to show them, they quickly backed off. It amused me to see how quickly they dropped the subject when I gave them a chance to find out the answer.

-Elliott

[Geoff Withnell]

At the Marine Corps Birthday Ball this year, late in the evening, the Commanding Officer of 3rd Bn. 25th Marines (in full Mess Dress) and his wife were walking out of the hotel to their car. I was standing outside chatting with a few of the Marines who had stepped out for a smoke.

About 20 paces out, the CO's wife turned and walked back to me and said "I have to ask, are you traditional?"

The Colonel's face turned bright red and I heard him say "I don't believe you just did that".

LOL. I just told her that's between a man and his kilt.

Or isn't, as the case may be!

Geoff Withnell

[Paul]

Here in Scotland the question is normally "Are you a true Scotsman?"
To that there are several replies:
"Yes. I'm from Glasgow",
"Well... yes - I'm wearing a kilt, amn't I?",
"No. I'm 1/2 Irish"

[Lallans]

I just got a good suggestion from the current posting "A Real Conversation Stopper" by I MacA. Next time, I'm gonna ask "are YOU wearing underwear?"
My problem so far has been that the question (1) normally comes from those I wouldn't care to know the answer from, and (2) direct exposition, legalities aside, is out of the question on cold days here in Canada- which is when I normally seem to get asked. We've all seen the Seinfeld episode, I trust.

Here's a new thought: Could the question be coming out of concern about certain cold injuries like, say, frostbite??

[Kilt TN]

yes, aren't we all naked under our clothes?

[Snowbear]

Usually I get that all the time. I've made a sport of it to tell different lines each time I get the question. I guess the only way to really find out is to find out for themselves, since a scot would never tell the truth in clear texture.

As for the cencerns mostly a man wonders if I freeze under the kilt, while a lady wonders if I freeze on my knees.

[Highlander31]

The men usually ask me why I wear a kilt, or if it gets cold underneath. The women either ask the question or if my knees are cold. Several times women have come up and asked my wife what I wear under the kilt. Some of her answers have received some interesting reactions.

[Geoff Withnell]

Deleted

[HarborSpringsPiper]

What cracks me up after wearing a kilt off and on for >35 years is people following up that question with "has anyone ever asked you that before?"

I've never really figured out what anyone's reason for asking is. I guess it's just what one says to someone wearing the kilt when you don't know what else to say.

I vary from humor or saying nothing to annoyance. I'm at a phase where I just find it annoying but try to keep good humor about it.

[CDNSushi]

Well, I need to work on my pithy replies. I've got them down pat in English, but the real challenge is knowing what to say in Japanese, as I rarely get asked: "What do you wear underneath your kilt?" (or variations of the question), but the much more to-the-point: "Do you wear underwear under your kilt?" The prior version lends itself to many clever replies like "lipstick" or "shoes and socks" etc... But asking directly is a bit different, I recon.

The locals do NOT share the same Judeo-Christian hangups about body parts and bodily functions as we have in the West. People don't think twice about stripping down naked in front of dozens of people at a public bath, nor do people flinch at the prospect of being literally surrounded by people at the doctor's office while the doctor is examining them. Privacy curtains are not required. lol.