Laughter?

[mudd]

Well, I’m sitting here in a motel room in Hemet, CA (the cultural capital of the western hemisphere) feeling grumpy about passing up a great opportunity to wear a Kilt.
You see, we’re visiting my Mother-in-law for Christmas. My wife and I thought it would be a nice show of respect if I dressed semi-formally in one of my Kilts for Christmas day.
We were going to make it a surprise, but my wife was talking to her a few days before we left and let slip what I was planning. I’m not sure exactly what was said, but I hear my wife saying things like; “a KILT!...Yes, I’m serious…What do you mean by that?” and so on.
Anyway, when she got off the phone, she suggested that maybe I shouldn’t bring the Kilt on the trip. I asked her what was said and she says, “Well, she said she didn’t want us to dress up or anything, but I’m pretty sure that she was trying hard to keep from laughing out loud.”
The picture of my mother-in-law laughing under her breath all day was enough to change my wardrobe plans.
So here’s the point of this post. How do you guys deal with being laughed at in your Kilt? I must say, I don’t like to be laughed at. Being laughed WITH, or in good humor is one thing, but someone snickering under their breath really irritates me.
So, what do you think?

[bubba]

Personally, I look ornery enough nobody would dare laugh at me. Seriously, wearing a kilt is odd enough to some people but they usually like the look once they actually see you in it. The secret is to behave as though it's the most normal thing in the world and wear it with pride.

[Southern Breeze]

It doesn't bother me at all. I have had people laugh and when they saw that I was wearing a tab shirt they couldn't shut up fast enough! :-D

[Kiltman]

The only ones I've ever had laugh were teenage girls. Their laughter was more than off set by older women who complimented me. Ignorance has to laugh to protect itself.

[Alan H]

Laughing at you is THEIR issue, not yours. Wear what you want.

Look at it this way. You just blew off wearing a kilt when you wanted to because you didn't want to put up with your MIL snickering at you. Not because you didn't want to offend someone, or because it was inappropriate, but because you didn't want to put up with her little chortles. Who came out on top in this exchange?

Wear a kilt if you want to, and if someone feels like snickering, that's their prerogative...just like it's your prerogative to wear what you darned well please....just like it's your prerogative to tell them to stuff their snickers up where the sun don't shine.

The LAST person I'm going to let define what I'm going to wear is my Mother In Law...maybe to her funeral, OK. Maybe to my Father in Law's funeral...all right. But other than that? Not a chance. Here's another way to look at it. If you laughed at your MIL, how would she react? Would she wilt at your snickers and change her behavior? Not bloody likely.

[Mr. Kilt]

My in-laws came to my parents house for Christmas dinner yesterday. You can see the pic of me in another thread I posted. My wife Karen was a bit concerned about what her parents would say. They'd seen me in a kilt before, but only once and it was casually. Her mom is a Russian immigrant and her dad came from Germany.

After they arrived Karen and her mom were standing off to one side while I was doing something. Karen says her mom whispered in her ear "my goodness, I didn't realize just how handsome he would look in a kilt".

Personally, I would have worn my kilt in your situation. It may have turned out the way my day did. And if she HAD laughed, oh well. Life goes on. I try not to let anyone dictate how I dress any more.

[Alan H]

One last thing... my post does come off a bit on the aggressive side, doesn't it? Hmmm... Here's how I usually deal with stuff like that.

1. If someone laughs at me for a good reason, then fine. Maybe I can see the humour in it too, eh?. If they laugh at me out of mean-spiritedness, well, then I just feel sorry for them. If they laugh to try to hurt, or hurt the people I'm with, then I respond....and this has only happened once... forcefully, aggressively, and nastily right back in their face. Four letter words are fair game, as far as I'm concerned, as is a whole lot of "I'm going to kick your @33" body language.

2. It's reasonable and mature to take another person's feelings into account when considering what you're doing/wearing. I mean, if your MIL honestly got upset at you wearing a kilt because....let's say because it reminded her of her grandfather or something, and that made her sad, then that's something to take into account. If there was a legitimate reason why your wearing a kilt made her upset, then maybe you shouldn't wear one. That goes double because you're a visitor in her home. They're just items of clothing, you know? We don't have to ram them down everyone's throats. A little sensitivity to other people's feelings goes a long way.

However, that's a LOT different from her snickering because she's either being mean-spirited or simply doesn't know enough to realize what kilts are. Clearly your wife doesn't have an issue with the kilt. If that's the case then your MIL shouldn't, either. Next time she comes to YOUR house, wear your kilt and if she comments or obviously gives you a couple of "those" looks, then face her straight on and read her the riot act, right there, right now, and don't take no for an answer.

My Humble Opinion.

[Big Dave]

Being laughed at sucks, but who cares. Live your life the way you see fit and wear your cilt with pride. If people want to laugh let them, they're just missing out on the fact that you know how to live and they don't.

[Bob C]

I'd have worn it just to spite her. Might have laughed at her support hose, too. ;-)

[Rigged]

Laughter? It happens so rarely. It's usually giggly teenaged girls or Beevis & Butthead types passing in a car.

Last year, I attended a party where one of the guests had a reputation as a put-down artist. She tried all night (imagine every rude comment and stupid question we've discussed on this list all coming from one person).

My friend who threw the party kept trying to rescue me from her, but I was well-prepared having attended the "XMarks Smart Answers to Dumb Questions" bootcamp (this forum).

She left frustrated -- especially when her daughter commented on how good I looked and suggested to her father that he'd look good in a kilt.

I think most of the negative stuff is in our heads. The rest is having a confident attitude -- and having snappy comebacks for those very rare occasions when someone is being genuinely malicious.