Twice in one night, "No, I am not the entertainment."

[sorcererdale]

This evening we went to a Gospel singers variety show. I wore my dark blue Utilikilt Mocker. At intermission I was waiting for my wife to come out of the bathroom, and a guy said to me, "Will you be playing now after the intermission?" I said, "Oh no, I am just wearing this because it is comfortable." He went on for a bit about me playing with the group with the pipes and drums.

He then said, and must not have wanted to accept my answer, "So, you are getting ready for St. Patrick's day, then?" I repeated and told him I wear a kilt a few times a week. He just sort of walked away then and didn't say any more.

Then I go back to our seats and there was a bunch of sweet, old ladies around where we were sitting. I kept standing for awhile before sitting, and one leaned down to me from the row behind and asked about the kilt. As soon as I started telling her about it, where they are made, and about tartan kilts too, suddenly all the little ol' ladies around us where leaning in and listening and commenting too. One lady said with a smile on her face, "They are nice and cool in the summer!" Then she said, "but for the winter I see you have knee socks on." I stepped back so they all could see. Then the concert was about to begin, and I heard her saying to the lady beside her, "And I just love men with nice legs!"

Then after the concert we stopped for gas and as I was paying inside, a guy walked in and asked if we had just come from practice. I explained again, and then he said he did know the pipes and drum teacher, whom I do know.

But I just find it odd, that now people are thinking Scottish kilts when they see a plain one. So that is good!

DALE.

[SteveB]

I am kilted every day, generally in a tartan. Boston is a very diverse city. Rarely do I get:

"Play the pipes?"
Current answer* is to ask the jean wearer "do you rope cattle?"

"Where is the Parade?"
I just name any city outside of the U.S.

Funeral Today?
"several, I am sure"

Only once, and while wearing a black Utilikilt "What part of Scotland are you from?"
Answer: Boston, Massachusetts U.S.A.

* Answer will have to change in three or four years, as I am learning the pipes, and if my tutor is still working with me by then I should be blowing perfect tunes.

Slainte

[Phogfan86]

My son and I are walking from our car to the designated meeting place for our pipe band prior to a parade today. We're in matching black sweaters, white shirts, black ties, kilts, hose, gillies and carrying bagpipes.

A woman coming the other way asks, "Are you two in the parade?"

You can't make this stuff up.

[GMan]

You really can't help but laugh at these things. Then roll your eyes.

[Mike in Dayton]

I get those comments a lot but mostly when I am wearing a tartan kilt. Not so much in the plain color kilts. Do I play the pipes or am I in a band are the most common.

Mike

[davidlpope]

Granted, it's hard to judge the tone of a conversation from just the recounted words, but I think that we who wear kilts often may need to cut the general public some slack when they ask about our attire.

Most people view the kilt as being a uniquely Scottish (or erroneously, Irish) national dress. I think that's a fair mindset for them to have if the only place they have ever seen a kilt being worn is by a piper or at by folks attending a highland games or some other related event. They probably have never been presented (at least until they meet you) with a situation where a person is wearing a kilt and not either playing the bagpipes or showing a connection to the Scottish Highlands.

I think sometimes their assumptions (So, you must be getting ready for St. Patrick's Day) are more of their attempts to be friendly and start a conversation rather than an indictment of your actions.

In a way all of us "play the odds" when we start a conversation. If I see someone who is wearing a UNC sweatshirt I don't make the assumption that he plays for the basketball team, but I do make the assumption that he likes that particular university. If I'm going to strike up a conversation I may ask him if he attended UNC. He may not have and say, "I just like this shade of blue," but he would be in the wrong to malign my question. Likewise, I think it's a fair assumption that someone who is wearing a kilt has a pretty good likelihood of 1) knowing that St. Patrick's Day is coming up, and 2) having plans to celebrate it. So, that particular statement may just be his way of trying to find some common ground to talk about.

Whether we like it or not, the practical reality is that we will attract attention when we wear kilts in environments where they are not expected (somewhere other than highland games, piping competitions, etc.) I think most of us are actually pleased when we receive this attention, if we're honest with ourselves.

I'm always encouraged when someone is willing to engage me in conversation about my kilt. I consider it an opportunity to be an ambassador for such a "noble garment". The other possibility is that folks won't say anything to you and their misconceptions will continue to exist.

I know it gets old to have to give the same explanations over and over. But for the people you're interacting with this is the first time that they have encountered the situation.

Obviously, what I'm referring to are good-natured, honestly held misconceptions. Mean-spirited attacks ("Hey skirt-boy, where's your high heels?, etc.) fall into a different category and should be dealt with as any other mean-spirited, demeaning statement.

Cordially,

David

[Rex_Tremende]

... I think that we who wear kilts often may need to cut the general public some slack when they ask about our attire.

[...]

I think sometimes their assumptions (So, you must be getting ready for St. Patrick's Day) are more of their attempts to be friendly and start a conversation rather than an indictment of your actions.

I had started an earlier reply to this thread - nearly the same thing happened to me last night, twice - but then I realized this was about non-tartan, contemporary kilts.

However, David's post plucks a weary nerve for me, in that it's been my observation that most comments like this aren't meant to start an actual conversation, but rather to give the other party a socially acceptable way of reacting when coming face-to-face with the unexpected man in a kilt. More often than not, in my experience, when their assumptions are not validated, they simply run out of things to say and are, in practice, quite incapable of carrying on a conversation. The question is sort of the kilted equivalent of "Hi Bob! How are you?" It doesn't expect an answer beyond "I'm very well, thanks!" The onus is on me, then, to advance the conversation, if there is to be one.

Here's a conversation ender: "No, I don't play the pipes. I just like to wear kilts."

And here's a conversation pick-up, if I'm in the mood: "No, I don't play the pipes. Are you interested in highland music?"

Regards,
Rex.

[Leprechaun 91]

I must agree with davidlpope about this.

I view my kilts as a way to engage and educate. I certainly find humor in the way some conversations begin. Many of these people however, would not likely begin a conversation with another stranger either.

I do wonder if these same people ask the person in traditional Indian dress any questions at all.

I live in an extremely ethnically diverse community. It is not uncommon to see traditional national dress from any number of areas. I never see anyone asking those from Asia, or India about their attire. It does seem to be "open season" on the kilted. This is likely a result of cultural familiarity and xenophobia (fear of the different). These questioners are not as threatened by our dress as we often assume. They believe (hope) we are receptive to their questions.

If they are willing to step out on the limb to talk to us, why are we trying to swing the axe to make them fall?

[Tatonka]

Yesterday was our town's St. Patrick's Day parade. I wore my new SW MacLaren kilt and as we were walking into a restaurant on the parade route, I was asked several times if I were in the parade. Just telling them I just like to wear kilts satisfied the askers. The really funny part of yesterday was during the parade, one of the motocycle riders in the parade stopped so his passenger could take my picture. It was one of my riding buddies that had not yet seen me in a kilt. The people around me just all looked at me like, "Who the heck are you?" All I could do is laugh.

[Madadh]

You should try walking an Irish Wolfhound and be in a kilt. Most are not sure what to ask, but they usually get around commenting on the size of my highland pony.