These have been around FOREVER... But I amuse easily. I still find these funny and still occasionally try them just for a quick, cheap giggle.
I don't know how you'd go about trying these on a Windows PC, but if you're on a Mac, just open up Terminal (from your Applications/Utilities folder) and you can play along.
Note that the '%' prompt indicates the C shell, while the '$' prompt indicates the Bourne shell. Mac defaults to Bash ($) so to get the % prompt, just type: tcsh
Oh, and please feel free to append your own to this list.
Code:$ ar x God ar: God does not exist $ cat "door: paws too slippery" cat: cannot open door: paws too slippery $ cat "food in tin cans" cat: cannot open food in tin cans $ lost lost: not found $ make love Make: Don't know how to make love. Stop. $ make war Make: Don't know how to make war. Stop. $ rm God rm: God nonexistent % gotta light? No match. % mkdir yellow_pages; cat > yellow_pages yellow_pages: Is a directory % !1984 1984: Event not found. # (on some systems) % rm meese-ethics rm: meese-ethics nonexistent % ar m God ar: God does not exist % "How would you rate George Bush's incompetence? Unmatched ". % [Where is Jimmy Hoffa? Missing ]. % ^How did the sex change^ operation go? Modifier failed. % If I had a ( for every $ Congress spent, what would I have? Too many ('s. % sleep with me bad character % got a light? No match. % man: why did you get a divorce? man:: Too many arguments. % ^What is saccharine? Bad substitute. % %blow %blow: No such job. % \(- (-: Command not found. % sh $ PATH=pretending! /usr/ucb/which sense no sense in pretending! $ drink <bottle; opener bottle: cannot open opener: not found $ mkdir matter; cat >matter matter: cannot create What -> >%touch me >%chmod 000 me >%touch me >touch: cannot touch me: permission denied Slightly enhanced version: % cd /tmp % touch this; chmod 000 this % ln -s /usr/bin/touch U % U this U: cannot touch this: no write permission $ ar x "my love life" ar: my love life does not exist $ ar x "matey, the treasure" ar: matey, the tresure does not exist $ talk Gorvachev@Kremlin talk: Kremlin: Can't figure out network address. $ talk Comrade Khruchev [Your party is not logged on] make "bottle open" make "heads or tails of all this" make love make mistake make sense man woman man -kisses dog
Bookmarks