when my wiff-ee and i go out and someone asks, and she's nearby she'll come over put her arm around my waist look at me and say "well if he's good he'll be wearing my lipstick later!"
and I'll reply "did you bring the new tube of lipstick with you? you know how I hate it when you don't have enough to finish!"



that usually gets dinner plate eyes and agape mouths ( and I think a few envious glances from the ladies)