Okay, okay....if she wants him more than me....the Gallant, Romantic, Knight of the Canyonlands...a better lover than Don Juan DeMarco, better even than Pepe LePew!

Say it ain't so...my heart is torn...ripped...all hope fades....perhaps a duel...a kilted duel for the heart of fair lass...dueling cabers....I shall yet win the heart of fair lass though all hope seems lost....

Or...at least invite me to the wedding so I can dust off my new Prince Charlie....and weep....